Obviously getting a bit lazy about blogging in my shitty attempt to avoid procrastinating by avoiding the computer. But now, as I am stuck on what to wear today, thus what to pack, figured I might as well do it now.

Bumped into Michelle in Kmart on Saturday, such a nice surprise. I probably said her name too loudly in shock but omfg so glad to see her, I'm missing everyone so much. Yeah only bummed for an hour or something but that's okay cause I get to see her in ten hours lol, should get some sleep.

Little else was eventful.

Sunday (an hour ago) was Christine's 18th! Of course, serenaded her with a less sultry rendition of Marilyn's birthday song to JFK, but I know she enjoyed it. UGH did nothing all day though. Oh, I attempted one maths paper. The hideousness... looked at the last two questions and just stopped okay, not cut out for band 5/6. Fuck maths and chem.

Dance Academy is shit, decided to catch up today and wtf no words.

Sigh, not looking forward to gaining weight tomorrow because I finally zumba'd today for the first time in weeks and boy, felt like jelly afterwards. But I am so excited to see people again SOB almost excited for HSC just so I can be in that familiar environment again lol, watch me eat my words in thirteen days. Hit the fortnight countdown and at this time in a fortnight, I will probably be giving up on Paper 1 and crying myself to sleep.

No idea if its hay fever or I've caught a cold but my nose has been blocked all day and the pressure has been building up in my head. Though how one catches a cold in the recent heat is beyond me.

I ordered my formal dress last night! Only after I sent in my measurements did I realise that I probably measured my chest wrong but whatever, it's backless so it can't really be tight or loose, hopefully. Anyway that's one thing off of my mind. Study is obviously still not on it though. Woke up just before midday because stayed up till 3am lol, and thought I'd make a start on Mod A by reading the introduction for P&P which got too boring so I read about ten chapters of the actual novel. Somehow that led to me youtubing the BBC version and I watched the last three episodes i.e. wasted three hours.

And then idk youtubed all these random Shakespeare production scenes.

So now I will properly sit down to Mod A and attempt to restructure some points and try to make sense of this insufferable module. And then reward myself with nutella brownies that my sister made.

Today was been beautiful warm and windy, and since I live in no bushfire prone area, I can enjoy the conditions.

No work from the very beginning of the day, literally I don't know what I've been doing. It just hit me that we'd graduated only a week ago and I'd done a pretty good job of blocking the sadness until I realised. It feels so long ago, I can't even remember how Tuesday went; our last normal school day :(

But yes I think all I've been doing is uploading lipsync videos on Facebook and watching all of them on repeat over the hours till now and I'm still not bored of it so there's no reason to stop.

Oh my god finally communicated with Anika today for the first time in pretty much a week, it was almost surreal hearing her voice again HAHA. God, looked through the grad photos together and went hysterical over her hilarious derp dance floor one.

Hung up over ordering my dress because I need to know how tall my shoes will be approximately so I can send in measurements TT Really, just hoping for less than 4 inches, that's already enough. And my proportions are so out of ... proportion.

Ooh filled out my UAC stuff last night but the server was so slow and it doesn't work from 12-7:30 am so my thing crashed at midnight on the last confirmation of payment and I was so close to a meltdown, it took two fucking hours. But then I checked this morning and it was all good so phew. Won't have to think about that till December.

Screw work. Shower, watch Tangled and then maybe read The Crucible. Or just pull out my notes, I don't know why I'm so reluctant to just read them, probably because I know they won't contribute to knowledge in the short term. Not going to remember what I read tonight, tomorrow.

Well, nearly two weeks. I'll panic then.

It's been such a beautiful week so far. Warm but not yet uncomfortable.

Yesterday was spent with Nayomi, unfortunately not being very productive. Shared a chocolate soufflé at Max Brenner for breakfast and the richness of the chocolate obviously fooled us into thinking that we were full. Then I picked up my beautiful books from the post office :')

Headed off to library and it was Nayomi's first time at Castle Hill library and I was pretty surprised how many people were already there by the time it opened. Bumped into Margaret and Jenny and Anthea.

Fuck maths is so hard why, literally couldn't do half the questions which were all from past HSC papers loool had not even seen such types of questions. It was a pathetic attempt.

Had maccas for lunch and there were more than 30 kids at least, Jesus Christ, we're going to start a child genocide, the world does not need these bundles of hell. Anyway resumed half hearted studying etc etc endured till about 6:30 so we could head off to dinner.

Lol felt pretty dumb making a booking just to be safe cause it was just us two there for about two hours. Ordered a bit more than we could handle lol, too many carbs but it tasted delicious in the beginning. I think our disturbing conversations also chased my appetitie away.

Hehe forced Nayomi to walk all the way from Baulko to Castle because we were so disgustingly bloated. It only took about forty minutes and it was such a pleasant night with just the right amount of breeze, plus the whole route was along the main road so any male sordid intentions would've been hard to carry out. And it was the perfect atmosphere for good conversations. Shame our bags were so heavy though, brought our laptops and all this English shit we never bothered to touch. Won't be going back to the library to study except for school.

Passed out before midnight, such an achievement and yeah wasted the morning just reading though. However I've narrowed down my formal dress to four options, which all happen to be read and now I can't decide at all and everyone's giving me differing opinions guh. Have to order that now PLUS do my UAC stuff ASAP. However, New Caledonia is covered and I'm just so super excited omg, travel agent emailed us this brochure on the country and everything and it just sounds amazing.

Anyway think I will start doing some English now. Literally have no idea how to study with so much time ahead and this is only a relative measure. Usually we'd start writing notes and finish a few days before assessments so I've only ever known how to sort of effectively cram. Really, we should just simulate exam conditions and do an essay every day but don't have the capability to do it without pressure. Finally I've appreciated how to bullshit.

Guess I'll get to that now. Countdown is less than 20 days.

My way of coping with no school is food. Literally, after that fortnight of starvation because I was just finding no time to eat at school, well I've certainly made up for it the weekend grad which I am sad about all over again because I just read Jess' blog and um I'm never gonna post about a school day ever fucking again... Moving on before I burst into tears.

Went to the city with my mum yesterday for no particular reason, but we had good Chinese food for lunch and then just strolled around in pleasant temperatures trying to find a formal dress. Giving up I think, just gonna decide on one online this week and custom order it because whatever, I have no time to find anything in real life plus it's so much more expensive. Also has Laduree macarons for the first time which was not disappointing but a little anticlimactic.

UGH woken up this morning at fucking 8am because our fucking neighbour decided to get their tree chopped and those uneducated men were just yelling and saws were going and my dog was barking and I just ran myself against our shared wall and hoped they realised I how much I fucking hate them. Cunts.

Highlight of the day was underwear sale at Myer.

Otherwise, did my sister's make up for social and then had Thai for dinner with my mum and waffles for dessert. Then got excited with Nayomi about our trip okay the images of beautiful beaches and sunsets and food are just keeping me going. Tomorrow or today, I should say, we shall begin studying together and then go and enjoy some African food for dinner yum.

Grad photos came out, weren't very exciting, I was hoping for more derpy one on the dance floor to laugh at.

I miss everyone.

It's been a depressing day, post grad syndrome or something idek but been sort of tearing up on and off throughout the day. I still haven't fully sobbed and I wish I could.

Otherwise, useless day. Failed some maths revision and fell asleep reading the introduction to my Hamlet edition. It was a good nap though, should probably stick to a sleep schedule now.

I'll start english tomorrow, and maybe make it an early start, otherwise it's impossible to get into.

I miss it.

Hello.

So holidays have technically begun. Not for us.

Slept at 3am last night, freaking out while I was stripping off my uniform that it's the last time I'll ever wear the winter one and boom, panic but no tears. Not for a while I don't think. Then somehow, I woke up at 6... so I forced myself back to sleep but 9 was the latest I could wake up.

Decided to head back to school cause LOOOL what else is there to do after graduation? Besides, last day of term anyway, why the fuck not. Arrived during lunch time and found Jess and naw Aerin was so cute, idek how she and Ariel okay it's so weird.

I went to print out my 4u for Winch and give her this awesome stainless steel bookmark as a pretty shitty gift for being my mentor but I think she'll like it, she doesn't have my final copies or anything. Now I just realised that she might find mistakes and be like well shit, this girl isn't getting full marks lol.

Lane had a free last so Suk, Jess, Christine and I just harrassed him for pretty much the entire period getting photos and crossing so many teacher-student boundaries kudos to Suk's inappropriate conversation okay, which was pretty awkward starting from Lane admitting that he's trying for a child which escalated into pregnancy woes for his wife, in particular, vaginal farting. So he decided to leave us then LOOOL but we followed him down anyway cause we figured we'd take photos in front of VA.

Omfg Lane is so adorable. He showed us this swag snapback he got from Year 11s and then just posed with us for so many photos. Suk named herself Crackanya. He's so cool, should've asked for his number or email so we could be friends. Nothing can be weird after everything that Suk said to him. He's coming to formal though so maybe can ask then (Y)

Sigh, got home and did nothing. Didn't even write a study plan. But I will study tomorrow, maybe maths because it's the easiest thing to do.

I felt so contented reading all the warm and fuzzies. No tears, thank god, don't think I could handle that now. But it just makes me feel so terrible about being slack about mine. While I'm still sentimental, I shall write them all out tomorrow and idk just wait till 14th October HAHA won't have as much meaning by then but that doesn't matter. I'll have said what I wanted to say. Just happily reading everybody's statuses.

Feeling really sad about it being Mr Lane's last day tomorrow, it didn't feel like a goodbye today because we were all having such a good time. It just felt like a see you later. I might die tomorrow, knowing people are at school but we're not supposed to be there anymore. Might trespass as well, cbf study what even is that.

OKAY GOTTA DO THIS BEFORE MIDNIGHT OMFG. I GRADUATED. WE GRADUATED AND IT WAS JUST THE MOST INCREDIBLE DAY EVER, IT'S STILL SO SURREAL I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO FEEL.

Well I lost it early this morning when I saw Nayomi at penno and the tears just started flowing. We got some waffles for breakfast and just chilled outside VA eating waffles and buying our last bits of food from the canteen which were hash browns. And yeah, was planning to finish some warm and fuzzies but obviously that was never gonna happen.

Wow the recess started and damn Nayomi got Christine going like a fucking tap, she didn't stop crying for a couple hours. I literally did not have that much liquid inside of me to be able to do that. But yeah gathered around the oval and started our photo spree. Shame I got so many polaroids and not enough digital pictures lol but idk what set me off, just started full on sobbing. Yeah just got lots of photos with all my teachers and everyone I could bump into and doing everything possible to delay walking to the whole school assembly.

Looool it was so goddamn hot and sunny, literally felt like I was going to faint while crying okay I was so dry. And we were too distracted, barely even listened to the speeches. Anyway, had calmed down until our grad song came on which we performed pretty well and I was just sobbing and sounding disgusting through the entire thing. It got worse when we got into the hall, ready for our clap out okay I was like heaving and shrieking sobs, didn't know my body could make such convulsions.

Clap out walk with Anika, ignoring all the students and just finding the teachers. Motherwell faked crying with us, though I wish she had cried. Ngaw Marshall was so nice and fat to hug HAHA while on the other hand, Burke was so muscular. Felt guilty about not giving Winch anything when I hugged her but oh well and ugh Gamble held me for longer than I was okay with but Lane gave such a nice hug, he's got such a nice height for it. So depressed, unless I got to school tomorrow, not seeing him again :(

Dried up by the end of that so we headed over to RSL to rehearse getting certificates etc. Then printed out Motherwell's class photo afterwards and got some takoyaki mmm so damn good and Anika finally tried vegieyaki.

Headed back to school cause idk, write some warm and fuzzies. Fucking jokes, we're pathetic HAHA just aimlessly strolled around the school taking pictures in our empty maths classes which was pretty sad. Then found Elaine and chilled on the netball courts in the beautiful sun, just talking and talking and not getting any fucking w.a.f's done okay why, but it was an awesome conversation. Nearly freaked out though when it was 5pm and school was about to close and um it was the last time I was gonna walk through those grounds as a student, so I started tearing up again sob.

Ran around Westfield getting last minute gift shit and then shitting our pants at Oliver Brown with Tanya, Jina, Nayomi and Anika cause um we literally had at least 15 w.a.f's left to write when there was an hour left till we had to arrive at grad HAHA. It was hilarious idek we probably disturbed everybody present but I had a fucking awesome time doing it.

Ran to RSL with Anika and Nayomi and lots of people had arrived already and yeah started rounding students and teachers to take photos before the ceremony started.

Wow um idk what they did to the school photos but everyone's Year 12 photo was disgusting because we had the biggest shiny spots, ugh. Baby photos were adorable though. But yeah it felt pretty surreal getting up there and collecting our certificates and then realising the report was in it when I opened it LOL. But surprisingly I did okay, considering how terrible trials were. Only shit for maths and chem, which I can deal with. Chem was sooo bad.

Entree was the only satisfactory meal. Didn't even touch my main and barely had dessert, so much energy was fueling me somehow. Think cause I was starving beforehand to the point where I couldn't take food, except now I'm kind of starving again. But yes ran around giving Motherwell her photo and Burke his Faulkner and taking endless photos and ugh Lane is so attractive why is he leaving why why. Lol worked up the nerve to get a photo with Hughson, it was a pretty bad selfie but then Amanda got one of us and his arm was around me and he smelled like alcohol but he looked so good. Lol Lane had a little bit much to drink I reckon, but that made him so much more entertaining and approachable.

They got our ceremony chairs off the little wooden floor area and started playing music so us being our grade, we turned graduation into a fucking party, just jamming for a good hour omfg it was so much fun. Dragged in Hatton and Briggs and Marshall and then tried to twerk with Lane and just had the best time sweating and dancing it out with everyone that I loved, even though I kind of punched Doris in the nose SORRY! Got up on stage even though we weren't allowed to and ended the night up there to Crazy in Love.

Sigh, everyone just filed out after the last song and omfg pretty sure we all forgot to sign the graduation book sob, I'll find it once we return for HSC lol. But yes got some last minute photos, got our warm and fuzzies and I think I condensed the day pretty well in ten minutes. Probably missed a lot of details but I can encrypt all of those for the next post. I just gotta get one out on the 19th of September.

No words to describe how incredible high school has been, particularly the last two years and how we've all developed so much and how we've all grown new friendships and strengthened old ones. Today was one of the most upsetting days but I had also never felt so happy. I'm ready to finish high school (will not think about things afterwards) but it's about time we said goodbye to one of the best 6 years of our lives, and they'll always remain as fond memories to me for as long as I can remember. I love everyone so much, tomorrow it will probably hit me that we're done and I might just crawl to school and cry but I will see everyone in only 25 days HAHA.

Time to read warm and fuzzies and cry and call people and tell them all how much I love them.

Well this is going to be a long post, and I'm gonna have a lot of fun writing it and reading it over and over again. BEFORE MIDNIGHT OMFG.

Numbness is still going strong. Figured today was the day I might cry, what with the end of classes. Nope. This is worrying.


Sigh, stressful morning buying last minute things for class parties and presents etc etc and then we had extension first, our last lesson as a class :( Thankfully Motherwell loves the wine we got plus the book (which she hasn't read, phew) so YES. Took some photos and ate lots of food and then we just bummed in the quad for half the lesson taking photos because the light was very nice. We also concluded that Tanya is partially colour blind since she thought her steak coloured jacket looked like bacon.

Lord belonging creative seminar was boring with Nayomi. It was enjoyable watching her mind implode when I told her that Deltora stood for a stone of each seven lands or something idk it's been a long time since I read that series and I never finished because I was too scared LOL.

Chem was surprisingly good and only because it was a proper meal okay, no chips and chocolate and other junk. Gamble brought her raclette and we grilled pepperoni and cheese and vegies and bananas and fried some noodles on the hot plate LOL. Probably smelt like meaty smoke for the rest of the day though.

Last lesson was eco, which was sadly anticlimactic. Dunn gave us a candle which we're only allowed to burn when we study eco. Then we ate ice cream while playing economics taboo and I managed to answer a surprising amount which I feel pretty good about. Sad though because in the polaroid I got with Dunn, she wasn't looking at the lense.


Omfg thought I was going to have a hemorrhage after school. Rushed to buy the fox masks and nearly cried when I barely saw any but they were all hiding in the back of the racks. But then the wig oh god, thank heavens that's finally sorted. Need to buy some yellow hairspray tomorrow cause it's white HAHA. I really hope Marshall remembers the choreo.

Also need to print Motherwell's photo and get a frame.

Woooow my pulse has been working overload from stress lol. Have not even done work for the past hour, just frantically talking to so many people at once. I swear I am going to non-stop cry after lipsync is done because, besides from relief and exhaustion, um we're really done.

Time to shower and just pull out whatever is warm and fuzzy onto some paper. And then meticulously pack my bag because someone is bound to forget something.

Seven warm and fuzzies took an hour, this is ridiculous. Like, fifteen to go omfg.

It was a good day despite the miserable weather which better clear up by Thursday because I refuse to be the first grade in our six years of HGHS schooling to graduate on a not-sunny day. That's the worst omen the heavens could possibly express.

YUM maths party, I can't even describe how orgasmic Kolhagen's caramel slice is, THERE ARE NO WORDS. IT IS HEAVEN IN MY MOUTH. Watched The Incredibles. Guess it was a good way to end maths in high school forever (cry) and we got some photos with Kolhagen. Actually feeling so depressed right now, that was my favourite class with Elaine and Christine :(
Double free was not particularly productive. Did not do warm and fuzzies as planned, just fooled around dancing in the gym the whole time.
Damn, got such a good view of Hughson during our year meeting mm. And yeah it made me freak out again, I just don't know how to feel.
God Hamlet seminar was so boring why Ms Winch why that was useless.

Gonna stay up as long as I have to so I can finish these stupid messages and slip them in tomorrow, assuming Lane hasn't taken the envelopes away yet. He probably knows how incompetent we are.

I'm also freaking out because I told Marshall I'd find a Hannah wig for him AND I HAVE NOT, FUCK.

Bright side; polaroid film came. So annoyed that tomorrow is my full day, gonna have to run around frantically finding students and teachers to take pictures with. Really might just skip chem... I'm not sitting around a grill playing chemical charades, forget it.

Just remembered that I teared up last night FINALLY after listening to Little Wonders. Even then, it was just tears streaming and no actual sobs forming. Plug is still in place. But I think my period triggered some emotion lol.

Last weekend, last fifteen minutes of last weekend of last week of school lol.

Strolled around Towers in the afternoon, trying to find a hoedown costume which was so ugly in Kmart and it's totaling $30... and I will never wear the ugly flannel or knee length skirt ever again so hopefully Carla's shirt fits sigh. Then lost control at Priceline because well why fucking not, there's nothing else to make me happy. Then coincidentally bumped into Carla and just browsed till she had to leave for tutor.

Bought lots of brownie mix and peanut butter and oreo and got to work on three batches of hideous oreo peanut butter brownies, but if they taste good, then nobody will mind. Also bought Motherwell's wine so that's one gift out of the way fml. Then omfg I lost my fucking junior uniforms. BOTH OF THEM. HOW DOES ONE DO SUCH A THING FUCK like my sports uniform and even freaking food tech apron is there but not the ones I need omg now I don't have a fox costume either cause idk wanna wear my senior blouse :(

Anyway, Erica pulled out of Miley which sucks. Seriously Drayton better not start something about the same Year 12s performing. Not our fucking fault if the same people participate and everyone else won't.

Late night tonight. Gotta do these fucking warm and fuzzies omfg and just because I want to, gotta do my nails too LOL.

Farewell.

Stomach is feeling super queasy, not sure if it's the dumpling I ate or just panic taking over again. I mean, yesterday evening kind of hit a peak and then it's been okay for most of today. Probably because I wasted the day watching Viva Las Vegas and drooling over Elvis.

In the meantime, no essay, no study, no fucking warm and fuzzies done. I have zero mindset to do anything but lie down and ponder. Except tomorrow have to go out to buy stuff for lipsync, maybe Winch's present idk too late to organise a group mentor thing for that so gonna have to fork out my own money sigh, and then buy wigs and thrift a flannel shirt and blotting paper because lipsync is going to have me sweating like a fucking shiny coin on stage. Also printing photos for some warm and fuzzies, just because why not.

30 days till HSC.

So ready to pass out but I have the obligation to thoroughly recount these last days. Plus it's Black Friday, but safe to say it hasn't been terribly unlucky.

Last night, stayed up till 2am with Michelle finishing our grade song which just made me want to cry so hard but I held those tears back. Won't have the energy to sing that on Thursday I don't think.

Shitty morning, was trying so hard to force the tears out but no they just sat in my eyes and it was terrible. It's like there's a lock on all these emotions, a time bomb till Thursday.
First period free, and last first period free, roaming with Christine and Nayomi.
Chem was agony, just wanted to put my head down. Cbf attending the party next week but everyone is required to bring something but fuck that seriously. Hate this class so much, I'm sure Gamble will be just as happy to be rid of us as we are to be rid of her.
Last Fun Food Friday in eco! Sat around eating Krispy Kreme donuts and chatting with Dunn about young love or something LOL. Then we did an essay plan idek didn't stop yawning.
Got our formal invites at lunch. Mine is so ruined, the calligraphy got smudged and I dropped it in the dirt so yeah...
Last period free was a failed attempt at writing one warm and fuzzy. It's still too hard.

Panic hit hard after school so I tried to make it go away by napping. Did not help in the end when I woke up again. Ice cream doesn't help.

Anyway think I'll call it a night. Worn out all the time from dancing.

Wow. We'd have graduated in a week, and we'd probably be sitting down to dinner exactly now in a week's time.

UGH it was cold today, I was just getting used to the warmth. Then the train was delayed and roll call was just so awkward, why did I go... Lang gave us a flower and cards that she wanted us to get others to sign, though the custom is to have them signed BEFORE we receive them loool. Not going to roll call anymore, that's my farewell.
I love how much we continue to learn every eco lesson, ignoring the concerning fact that we should already know all this stuff but Dunn always finds new bits of information to enlighten us with. Going to miss her so much. Hindy is back in the holidays so I guess he can help us with last minute stuff next term.
Halfway through Hamlet, and collected my class money for Motherwell, so just the other class now (Y) Gonna have to buy the wine this weekend or something.
Taught Ravie Miley in our free and then just chatted. Sigh, going to miss sharing our opinions in Maths and English :(
Auditioned at lunch. Erica forced me to do fox which was very embarrassing. And then yeah, taught more Miley. Praying this will somehow come together.
Last maths lesson was depressing. Going to miss it so much sob sob sob. Christine, Elaine and I failed NSGHS multiple choice, it was so freaking hard wtf. But excited for Monday's morning tea with Marshall's class and Kolhagen said she'll make those delicious caramel slices again omfg salivating at the thought.

Shopping for costumes after school was a little hopeless. Wigs are so fucking expensive, like $90 omfg. But Michelle found some under $5 at Hornsby so those will suffice. Priceline is having another sale okay, my wallet cannot deal with all the cash I'm removing from it.

Fetched my camera and sister's polaroid so I guess it's time to start taking photos tomorrow LOL. She only has two film though, have to wait for Christine's order next week.

Gotta finish these warm and fuzzies fml, only typed half up. Then I've got to actually write them out. Screw being pretty, people will be satisfied with a piece of paper.

Oh my fucking god idk what virus my family downloaded but these coupon drop ads are driving me insane, it took me 20 refreshes to be able to start writing a fucking post.

Anyway. Wednesday. So much closer to the end of the week than Tuesday. Perception. So safe to say I'm intensely freaking out.

Sigh, got to school at 8am to go over hips dance, even though I was so tired I barely remember what we did. Keep forgetting that we also gotta audition soon. Think Erica and I will do that for Miley tomorrow, who knows.
No sub for English, we just put Hamlet on except pretty sure I was the only one who was watching. Finally realised I recognised Gertrude's actor from Doctor Zhivago woooow.
Omfg these birds would not stop tweeting during maths so Kolhagen threw a rubber at them that ended up nearly hitting Mr Re LOL. Test was hard. Feeling less confident now lol.
After going through the dilemma of balancing the discussion of two governments' policies for exams, had fun in eco just laughing at not really sure what. Two parties planned WHOO and Dunn said she'll bring eco games for us next Tuesday HAHA. Think eco is our last lesson... breathe breathe breathe.
Lunch with Nayomi, lucky bitch is going to Dubai.
Taught Tanya some Miley in last period and then I got home super early and just curled up into a rocking ball on my bed for a few hours because I just could not fathom that we have a week left, the panic is slowly accumulating, and then occasionally it'll just knock the wind out of me like it did today. Think I might cry tomorrow, once it's really just under a week. Breathe breathe, maybe a paper bag will help.

No work. Wrote two warm and fuzzies, this is so hard, who would've thought.

Guh, early night.

Quietly ignoring my final days of school countdown. I'll begin to freak out tomorrow when we've pretty much hit a week. Fuck fuck fuck.

Wow, good day indeed, minus the amount of sweat I produced today. Obviously did nothing last night except learn The Fox dance which is the best thing ever. IT'S SO HILARIOUS. However, Burke declined participating. On the bright side, Marshall is cool with being Hannah Montana okay, this is so exciting!

Spent first period teaching Miley to Jess, Michelle and Suk HAHA skipped chem as usual, waiting for Drayton to come and interrogate me.
RECESS. Everyone in Fox came and picked up on the dance pretty quick! It's not that hard, but just omfg can't keep a straight face, everyone laughed at me LOL :( But it's going to look awesome.
Attempted to teach Miley again to Flo, Elaine and Tanya. Wasn't easy considering only half the choreo existed, but then so tired so I went to the library and attempted a shitty Calvino essay plan that never went to use anyway.
Motherwell gave up on presentations, thank the lord, so we just went over some past essay + creative and there is no way, NO FUCKING WAY to prep a creative. The stimulus is so specific, it's ridiculous.
Gym exploded with lipsync acts at lunch, so it was a pretty useless environment to learn anything. Still got a long way to go for our hips act but that will be easy to fix, hopefully.
Erica, bless her soul, helped me finish up Miley choreo WHOOO and then we taught it to Jina and Nayomi and if they picked it up in less than a period, then hopefully this whole thing can be polished in 2-3 periods with everybody. Sweating like a beast by then, but it was so much fun.

Motherwell shouted our mentor group afternoon tea at blu water grill. The cake was fucking delicious but I'm so ready to throw it up right now. Probably disturbed the few other people sitting around us with our inappropriately loud conversation and laughter, but no matter. Jo gave her our presents, the five little 'in one sitting' books which look so adorable together, I'm gonna have to go and buy them myself.

Anyway, still cbf work tonight. Might try to work on warm and fuzzy stuff and progress halfway for my eco essay, which is only another hundred words...

So. Excited for lipsync.

What happened to the weather today :( Haven't felt cold in quite a while.

Depending on how I look at it, it has been a very productive and unproductive day.

Eco essay is on like, 300 words. 500 to go, great (Y) Fiscal structure makes no sense, I mean you always talk about the same things for monetary. Not even going to agonise over micro yet but GUH eco has to be done asap cause Dunn is leaving us for South America. I hate her so much, it's like Year 10 again but we didn't care back then.

Otherwise, the day has been spent trying to organise lipsync acts because Erica, bless her, found that fucking hilarious fox thing which is now going to be an act WHOO. Except now I'm in five acts and there are still other Year 12 ones so kinda concerned about one of them getting cut from the night show, which would be the biggest waste of all this time, especially when we're foregoing study. Miley is kind of half choreographed, very shittily but we're allowed to look stupid for our last performances. It's also so difficult to remember your own choreo, I won't take others' for granted anymore.

Christine's ordering my pug dress from ASOS! White probably won't even flatter me but w/e, design is adorable.

I will get this eco thing done. And consider doing an ext presentation but most likely not.

Well it's been a positively shit day despite the beautiful heat. I think it reached thirty degrees today. Spent the morning cleaning and then well, I had company by noon. Have to say, I was feeling pretty unreasonably angry all afternoon at the intrusion of my grandparents lol. I mean, it is another change to add to the soon to be change of leaving school.

Went to Cherrybrook to have some pho for lunch. Probably the highlight of my day.

Failed to work all day. I got an intro for a fiscal essay and it ends there, no idea how to write this. Then from 5pm till now, ABC has been on with election coverage that's just had me fuming all night. At least it was not a landslide victory. Hopefully Plibersek will try for Labor leadership, Gillard shouldn't have paved the painful road for women for nothing. Of course, Abbott and his party would love another female to abuse, wouldn't they. Like Suk says, no self-respecting person, particularly female, would vote for HIM. I hope someone contests his leadership soon.

AND NOW WE HAVE TO LEARN TWO FUCKING BUDGETS FOR HSC, AND HOCKEY'S WILL NOT EVEN MAKE FUCKING SENSE. HOW THE FUCK AM I SUPPOSED TO WRITE ABOUT A DIRECT ACTION PLAN? PLANT SOME TREES WITH YOUR GREEN ARMY AND GIVE BILLIONS OF DOLLARS FOR BUSINESSES TO WHAT, HOPEFULLY REDUCE PRODUCTION EMISSIONS? It's not worth the marks, sorry.

Jo bought Motherwell's present YAY we can give it to her during our high tea on Monday.

Ugh, cbf work tonight. What's the point writing a budget essay about a budget that's about to be wiped off the table?

Well, good thing is my boredom and the slow vote tallies let me do a nice manicure.

Today was a pretty good day. Last Friday with this schedule. I'm still waiting for my meltdown.

Sob horrible morning. Got woken by a leg cramp, it's the second time this week amd then yeah, dropped my phone and now the screen has all these spidery cracks on it and its so hard to even see what I'm texting.

Turns out the first ext class did nothing with those non existent presentations so Motherwell was super chill with us, albeit very irritated that half the classes skipped. It was good though, I liked the smaller class.
Anyway that was my only period for the day. Spent third free with Nayomi and Anika dancing and I taught them the hoedown throw down hehe. Then lunch with Lisha and Romi as well and we pretty much got our things covered except for one dance that Romi will choreo this weekend so yay excited! I feel like giving up with Miley though because I am completely blank on choreo. Except for about ten seconds but lol.
Skipped chem last and went home, it was beautifully hot.

So grandparents are back tomorrow, I feel terrible for not wanting them back but I can't stand the idea of living with people again, not when I've developed my own routines and rules and just can't stand adults nosing into my business and UGH. Can't play my music loud or call with speakers or dance and sing around the house or cry if the time finally comes. No more random guests either. Too tired to even commemorate my last night, just gonna sleep ASAP.

Wow, a fortnight has passed since trials.

Eco seminar was really good today, except the $40 essentially went to the four booklets that Dunn could've eventually photocopied for us one day. Either way, great revision. No attractive high school boys. Sexton was like, be on the lookout for prospective husbands LOL.

Lunch in the fancy Westfield food court. Got some crepes and weird chunky banana juice and pistachio ice cream.

The day was so lovely and warm, think it nearly hit 30 degrees but city was still quite mild. Just prowled through Kinokuniya and omfg found an awesome dynamic book for Motherwell slfkjldkfjlskdf half her present is set (Y) Plus got my own de Botton essays on sale hehe, they've remained expensive.

UGHHHH CANNOT DO THIS EXTENSION. This is so dumb. Why am I staying up for this, foregoing precious sleep and exercise time. But I know so many people will jig (just my row) and Motherwell is going to be furious so maybe she'll go easy on the rest of us poor souls who braved the humiliation of presenting nothing. Fingers crossed extension feedback will take half the lesson.

Exercise the disgustingly fatty lunch off and shower and looks like I'll be pulling a late night tonight. But free first (Y)

Yes, last full day ever I think WHOO.

Maths was difficult. It's so cruel how things get so hard in the span of flipping one page to the next question. Kolhagen will enjoy marking those.
Ms Booth was our chem sub. Memories of Year 7 VA loool, and that elephant sculpture we made from a guitar.
Eco is the only good class, endlessly learning because we obviously know nothing. And we did quite hideously for multiple choice.
Sigh, got ext back and okay it wasn't hideous, like 10/25 standard so I'm satisfied. Wasn't a huge flop; that is still chem haha.

Haven't and won't work tonight, except maybe attempt the maths question that we miss tomorrow because of eco. Sur-fucking-prise, no liberal spending/cut figures to dissect at the seminar tomorrow. Policy statement was utter bullshit. It still spent a good couple of minutes taking shit out on all the other parties while still failing to offer anything of its own. Jesus, let's just hope Abbott's vow of stepping down from Opposition Leader if he loses will act as an incentive to not vote Labor so he can just leave.

Anyway, pumped for lipsync. Lisha taught us a new dance which took me all arvo to finally remember without stumbling. Still gotta choreo the next two songs but it should be good. As for Miley, sigh it's hard. There's only so long we can jam on stage for before it's just not fun anymore. And I really hope hip hop comes together.

Another thing to organise is presents UGH. Except Gamble, idgaf my class can do whatever and I'll give two dollars. But definitely for Motherwell, Winch, Dunn and Kolhagen, and I feel that Drayton deserves something for and from Ext 2 as well.

It's supposed to be hot for the next few days. Winter uniform is going to be unbearable, but it holds the sentiment of this last term. Summer uniform is supposed to be reserved for HSC but I don't think we can deal with that wool skirt in 30 degree heat.

Today was my first full day in over a month, and it did not encourage a good mood. Plus bus was late and I missed the train and etc all that shit.

AND ext is infuriating okay our stupid presentations are due Friday and just, it's so dumb. Tomorrow, ext get results back in adv which will be a wonderful ending to the day AND Motherwell plans to go over each persons individual essays for advanced trials, though I doubt she'll even get through half the class in two and a half weeks.
Belonging creative seminar was thankfully not tedious. Sandra's manic laughter in my ear also forced m to stay awake.
Wow lol did not even have a sub for chem, went the whole lesson without a teacher. Quietly did my eco while everyone else attempted chem papers which I hear did not go that well lol.
Spent pretty much all of lunch in 211 promoting English majors and a surprising amount of Year 11s turned up, probably just over twenty of them. Ugh but I was so annoyed when I heard some saying they were only considering this because they didn't want ten units or whatever UGH that'd be the stupidest mistake ever, this fucking major should be worth two units for all the time and dedication and tears it requires.
Cash rate Tuesday stayed the same. I love arguing about eco multiple choice. You always learn something new. And it's amusing to exasperate Ms Dunn with my pathetic knowledge, or lack of.

Oliver Brown waffles and a nice conversation with Nayomi after school, though I'm a little disappointed that the waffles weren't crunchy despite appearing slightly burnt but oh well. Spoke about inappropriate things too loudly and examined the not very attractive waiter too overtly.

Omfg going through baby/child photos are the best, THEY ARE SO FUNNY! But saddening because I was a much cuter baby and then something just went wrong once I turned five. But the baby photos hardly resemble my current appearance, and the ones that do when I was five don't look that great. We should really have three photos as baby, kid and now, so that there is actual visible progression of appearance. Narrowed them down to twenty LOL and I still gotta take a picture as a current one tomorrow in my jersey.

Did eco multiple choice which is good enough for tonight, need my sleep. Sigh, NOW I'm missing my post trial week.

Week A sucks. Two full days coming up, why can't eco be on one of them fml.

Today was only a half day. Maths and then spent free with Sandra and then second free dancing. GUH it was getting so hot. Christine bought a pawpaw. We had a professor speak about Hamlet last period which was a bit repetitive, nothing really new except some things we probably couldn't include in an essay. Also, it was so stuffy and cramped omfg.

Anyway it was a sunny day, as forecasted. Of course, morning was ruined again by Sunrise and it's political coverage, as well as the fact that Rudd finally lost his majority as preferred PM. It is just splendid how all the people rooting for Abbott are the ones that are going to get fucked in their asses by his policies, which oh wait, he has yet to fucking announce, but everyone can guess them anyway. And I suppose it can't be a surprise that it's all the lowly non-educated people going against Labor. Sorry but uhm, Liberal caters to a small number of the wealthy.
Right now, I am just fuming over this article by an AMERICAN economist positively analysing our economy's status and kindly telling us to stfu over all these scare campaigns about our fictionally disastrous future with Labor. One person had the nerve to comment that the average 'joe' on the street in this goddamn country knows more about the Australian economy than this Nobel laureate for economics... and this is the only reason I'd support Abbott. So he can fuck up this fucking country and then maybe it's citizens will finally swallow the shit spewing out of their brains. I fucking hate ignorant people.

Last night saw a poor attempt at reading FLW. I was gone after one chapter, equivalent to about four pages. Good fucking job.

Wow the amount of ceebs I feel is amazing. Maybe I'll just read some eco essays and call it a night. Waking up is so nightmarish.

First day of spring. I was overjoyed to see that the dead tree outside was starting to bloom these pink buds on the branches.

It has not been a very productive weekend, partially because I got out of bed at noon and partially because Saturday was useless and that usually carries over to Sunday. Finished maths trial corrections which is all that's necessary in the very short term. Gotta do fucking ext, and tonight I shall read FLW to sleep.

Spent the rest of the afternoon finishing Choke in the sun. Now I feel sad because it was a good excuse to procrastinate since I started reading it in my post-trial week, but now because HSC is in six weeks lol, can't let myself start a new book. Gotta go back to old texts now. Read eleven texts in six weeks. Easy.

Depilated my legs, hurt as usual.

I've got to compile a new book list for next year, and post-HSC. My reading tastes have changed a lot this year.

It's been a long day but it's been a long time since I've missed a day so this post will sacrifice ten minutes of potential sleep. So. Tired.

Impulse decided to go to multicultural fair today because open days are pointless. Haven't attended either since year 10, but it was a lot more impressive this year. The turn out was huge, a ridiculous number of families. Anyway just walked around with Tanya finding food. Spent like, $15 sigh. Otherwise there still wasn't much to do but it was nice soaking up the sun and warmth and noisy atmosphere. Rest of the day was spent helping VA people package their majors and then Ria gave us one of her awesome shirts! Snatched a Marilyn one but I really wanted the one with someone who looked like Natalie Wood idk. Either way, it's awesome, got Elvis and Marilyn (Y)

Trained with Nayomi and Tanya to city, met up with everyone and got seated in a very crowded little setting idek. It was a very mediocre restaurant, Pepper Lunch or udon could've provided the same thing. Darling Harbour was loud and lit up.

Pissed off, bus ride was fucking awful. And I thought this guy was gonna rape me.

Missed my midnight deadline. Now I'm even more pissed off.