Stuck like a fucking bitch with English but I'm ready for the suffering. Today was hopefully, maybe wrote a thousand words total which doesn't even bring me to 6000 but that's okay, I have six hours to go and I had a bowl of cereal. Gonna fucking do this. Jokes my eyes are already drooping. Life is shit. And it's a full day tomorrow WHILE THE NEXT TWO DAYS WERE SUPPOSED TO BE HALF DAYS MOTHER FUCKING SON. OF. A. BITCH.

Anyway Nayomi just told me to stop liking Victoria's Secret pictures and get on with English. Wise words.

Actually my main difficulty is not giving this shit up and staying up all night to rewatch LBD cause that's the only coherent thought I have.

So.

I can't stop my feels for LBD o m f g been watching episode 98 on repeat about fifty times last night so I stayed up till 2am literally watching those few minutes and then some more this morning and then throughout the day when I was stuck with 4u, which essentially means throughout the whole day. I want to die. I should have done a reaction video or something, screaming at 1am. Let this be real. LET THIS BE REEEEEEEEEEEAL. And then there was a clip of Ashley and Daniel reading out the kiss scene from Fault in Our Stars, but they didn't re-enact it :(

Need to somehow purge this obsession out of my life for six months because lol, HSC timetables today. Woke up too late to pick up my sister but then Seowoo texted and just jumped right out of bed to the computer. God, timetable is pretty shit. I finish within two weeks and that is no good, time is needed for each subject and omfg how cruel to not let us have an extra day to study for English Paper 2 far out, but thank god I dropped legal cause I don't think I could handle three exams in the first week. However, ext and chem on consecutive days sucks too, but that's alright. FINISH IN OCTOBER! As from tomorrow, there are exactly six months till I'm done.

Anyway, was so caught up in panic that it took me a while to raid my sister's suitcase but I eventually got there and hehe very happy with everything and I fucking love that Elvis shirt AND 1.5KG OF MILK TEA HAHA. There's another kilo or so back in China that my grandparents will bring back when they visit later this year. No make up though, except a blush, fucking China and their shitty Sephora and Duty Free.

So I'm trying to not regret spending the whole of yesterday watching LBD instead of writing 4u and ditto with today. Not sleeping, I am so stuck and I know that when the next few hundred words trickle by, I should be able to do most of the ending with more ease, since that's essentially the only part of my first draft I'm retaining. Then bs journal and biblio...

Screw hip hop tomorrow, who even has the time for that?

Alright work. Darcy.

Blogging to prolong the inevitable moment of finishing the Lizzie Bennet Diaries which is a heartbreaking thought. I've concluded it's my favourite adaptation of P&P and that even includes the 2005 movie. I don't know how I'm supposed to refrain from rewatching and rewatching and rewatching.

Either way, missed out on a considerable amount of blogging so time to finish that ASAP so I can finish the vlogs and cry.

Friday:
LAST DAY OF MATRIX WHOOOO. But before that was more important becaaaaaaaause I GOT A HAIRCUT. It was just, wow, it felt so good to have all those horrible dry ends chopped off and not get caught when I slung my backpack strap over my shoulders. The only haircut I'm happy with, most likely because it was so miserable having that butt-reaching hair before. Since this was at like, 10am, I got to Matrix super early and that was convenient cause Christine and Eric finished the topic test super early so we just ate a lot and sat around. AND THEN PIZZA CAME omfg delicious, so many carbs. The test was really easy though I actually just asked for most of the answers, couldn't remember much on my own. Now I won't touch chem until assessments.

Chilled at Rhodes afterwards with Anika and Tanya by the waterside while waiting for everyone else to come alone. After Anika left, Tanya and I just found some playground and sat around for a good half hour waiting. FINALLY Christine, Eric, Brandon, Justin, Michelle and Jina came, phew. And jokes for dinner/argileh, just lazed on the couch eating leftovers and thai takeout mmmm.

Took Brandon back to the station and the rest of us went back down to the waterside and idk Ahmed chimed and Jina was just wow hehe. But she dunked my thongs into the polluted water...

Put on The Experiment when we got back which was not very scary thank goodness, survived without Michelle but it was pretty disturbing and I've been wondering if I could use it as a related somehow... lots of techniques.

LOOOOL we took a polaroid but then it only captured Christine's huge face in the front and a tiny image of Jina. What a waste.

Basically watched movies all night, White Chicks, Green Hornet. Pretty sure that one was boring so I fell asleep.

Saturday:
Too lazy for Glebe. Sigh.

Holy moly Christine's living room gets so much sun, we went temporarily blind when the curtains opened. Just sat around being super lazy while Christine cleaned and then finally got off our asses to eat something and I ordered a ridiculously expensive but delicious fish burger.

Lol Christine left for a party and the rest of us just stayed at her place by ourselves, watching movies and listening to music and eating, endless eating. Wonder how she explained to her mum how all that rice and leftover and nine packets of mi goreng disappeared. And snacks and drinks and everything....

Tanya and Jina left so Eric forced me to sit through the agony that was New Moon. Then two asian guys started yelling and beating each other up on the road outside the block, pretty interesting to watch, and even four police cars emerged.

Picked up Christine and we went to play on the giant chessboard LOOOL my first game in ages, and I lost of course. Really hate that game. Watched more movies when we got back, idek, Salt (which I actually enjoyed a lot) and Christine and Eric fell asleep so I just put on the Hannah Montana movie, except I wasn't able to sing aloud :(

Sunday:
Eric left early, though we woke up late but whatever. And then it was just me and Christine which was lots of fun. Made a huge breakfast of some weird porridge/rice and mixed it with mi goreng and termed it the wang-luo idek looool and just talked and talked which we actually haven't really done for a while. Of course, eventually attempted 4u and I think we both got a 100 words before I left so that was alright.

Got myself some yogurt at Epping, waiting to get picked up and I guess I was not expecting the Subaru but oh well, went for a ride in our new AUDI when we got home. It's a lot more luxurious on the outside, not particularly spacious in the backseat but it's leather so I won't complain. I should get my Ls.

Anyway, made the bad decision to continue the LBD sob, probably watched about 50 episodes in the last five hours ish idk, forced myself to stop at 90 and exercise so I could come back and enjoy the last ten episodes. And a few of them actually made me cry, the actors are pretty incredible and I just pretend that this whole thing is happening in real life. Nearly fainted when I saw Darcy, with his side profile perfection and god, that jawline. ALMOST AT THE EP WHERE HE GETS WITH LIZZIE, I NEED TO REFRAIN FROM SCREAMING.

Loooooooong post. The next two days are going to be a nightmare with 4u, and I don't even want to think about 3u or anything else I gotta do, they just don't exist on my priority list. First things first though, picking up my sister early tomorrow (might as well get back in school routine omfg) and I'm excited to get my stuff! As well as see her, it's been quiet, but can't complain about that.

OKAY GOING TO FINISH WATCHING BYEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE.

Stupid Anzac Day.

IT HAS BEEN SO UNPRODUCTIVE starting with waking at midday lol cause Christine, Tanya and I stayed up till 2am. And my 4u just got cut down a good deal since I decided to edit the measly amount that exists.

God, found my Mod A essay and typed it for the tutor and it was just horrifying having to reread it and send it to her. Shame. Anyway, I have done nothing except an introduction for the eco essay and chem multiple choice, when the topic test is tomorrow. And not staying up past 1am tonight, gotta get up early to get my haircut which I'm very nervous for. Don't know how to get it cut. I just know what I don't want, maybe that'll help the hairdressers.

Impulse baked some red velvet omfg, took so long cause I had to bake and cool one layer at a time which took about two hours altogether and yeah, it's delicious but soooo much sugar, felt like heartburn. Maybe I'll bring some to Christine's.

Chem is too hard, can't cram all of this in one night so I'm probably not going to bother and copy Jason tomorrow.

I'm never going to eat almonds again.

Goodbye.

Night time temperatures just bite into your skin, it's a miserable feeling, and winter hasn't even come yet.

Had a breakdown last night to my mother, who was of little use except to tell me things I already know about study and life and perspective. And uhm yeah, it probably didn't sink through since I have not touched work since class ended today. It was pretty boring, but we finally finished the theory! Of course, it's a huge load to study for Friday so I probably won't end up studying and just copy Jason anyway. Sad to leave Louise, though she is taking shipwrecks next holidays but it just seems like such a waste of time when we need that fortnight for trials.

Edwina's coming back on Monday, which is just a mindfuck to think that it has been two weeks and it has somehow gone by so quickly AND I HAVE NOT DONE MY WORK. Whatever drive there was for 4u does not exist anymore. Haven't started 3u, and I'll probably try eco tonight since it's relatively the easiest. And of course, I won't touch maths.

I have shamefully given into an English tutor, who tutors my sister and is apparently good, because I am failing advanced so fucking hard and I just don't want to know about 3u either so maybe she can fix whatever is wrong with me. Fucking hate advanced, I HATE IT SO MUCH.

One good thing: planned haircut for Friday morning at the Parra place that always disappoints, but oh well. It's so long, it probably won't appear too different anyway. I just don't want my ends to feel like hay. OH and sleeping at Christine's again yay i.e. not doing work like she plans to lol. Fat chance, Christine.

Anyway, gotta take advantage of tomorrow. One whole day devoted to anything BUT chemistry. Sounds amazing. Must get to 4500 words minimum tonight and omfg update journal and start thinking about reflection content and report. And maybe rewriting my viva voce lol.

Exercise first.

Monday blues. Holiday blues. Just let me go back to school and enjoy legal frees.

Bright side; takoyaki for lunch, which wasn't as tasty as the street ones but its takoyaki.

UGH it's unfortunate that we've technically finished the okay part of monitor/management because the rest of the module is just DRY as Louise puts it, which is supposed to be ironic cause its on water. As for shipwrecks, I so do not want to waste my trial holidays learning that, even if we get Louise and I can probably get into a morning class.

Did yoga for the first time in over six months I think, I've been traumatised ever since I pulled my chest during fucking school yoga. I feel good, even though I'll be sore for a few days. Perfect stress buster.

I've been reading Plath's journals in awe of how every single thing she writes manages to be a story in itself, not just a boring recount like we write on our blogs, which also reminds me of my abandoned journal lol, I don't think I've written in it since February. But that's okay, most of these writers wrote between long intervals. If only Austen had a diary.

Okay going to attempt a little bit of 4u, and if I focus hard enough on that, I can ignore how dead I am for 3u. Postmodernism is obviously not my forte, cannot be fucking dynamic.

I also realised that it was two days and a year ago that I got an iPhone lol, pretty notable moment of my life. And it's also been a bit more than a year since we've moved homes. Things change a lot.

Sob, end of the weekend, and what an unproductive one it's been at that.

It's Buttons' birthday today and she's six years old! Which is a sad thought, almost halfway through her life. Anyway, the cake recipes we looked up were much too complicated for a dog LOL so I just fed her a spoon of peanut butter.

Did nothing all day but chem hw and only attempting 4u now lol cause I finally got a better response from Winch.

Parents bought an Audi today! So I was getting all excited about getting the current car but jokes, that's going to my stepsister apparently and there's no way I'm gonna be allowed in the new car so never gonna end up driving at this rate.

Excited for Christine's again YAY best way to celebrate end of matrix. Of course it would've been better if matrix actually ended on Thursday and we spent all of Friday out or something but no, fucking Anzac Day.

Okay work.

WOW really took advantage of the weekend. I plan to start work in half an hour (Y)

Woke up and was too tired to get out of bed so I started Youtubing and somehow discovered the Lizzie Bennet Diaries omfg spent literally hours just lying there watch and I love it so much AND I'M GOING TO WASTE SO MUCH TIME OVER IT NOOOO. So I probably got out of bed at 1pm and had pumpkin soup for brunch. Hehe butternut pumpkin/Taylor's nose.

I don't know, I just felt like revisiting my old clothes, mainly shirts and I cut a few up into crop tops and fixed gross necklines or whatever, and it sucks that I didn't do it earlier when it was actually warm enough to wear those things TT

Mum made shepherds pie. The potato layer was just delicious.

Anyway, just finished watching St Trinian's and god, I love all the Darcy references in every Colin Firth movie. Though it must get annoying to never be able to escape a role.

Jokes, think I'm going to do some internet shopping.

TFGITF. Intentional extra effs.

Wow it was cold today, the wind was just painful and it was the first time I'd pulled out a scarf in idk how many months. Saw Sylvia today! Kinda miss school.
Matrix went slowly, should probably feel a little sad that there's four days left ie four days left of Louise.

Met my mum in the city afterwards for dinner but we just got udon and some bread sticks which I need to eat now because I'm hungry, even though it's nearly midnight. Funny bus ride on the way home, listening to this creepy old Indian man try to talk to some Year 11 girl who I must admire for her tolerance and politeness.

What a Girl Wants was on tv! That movie is on sooo much I think it's been three times in the past year, but no one gets sick of Colin Firth and Oliver James.

Vampire Diaries... no words. I'm just fucking depressed for the season finale in the next few weeks because it's graduation and besides the fact that cutting the school is cutting out a huge part of the show, terrible reminder of what's happening in less than six months...

And I'm fucking pissed because I sent Winch a looong detailed email of my 4u and attached my draft and waited FIVE DAYS for her response and I finally get one today. It was one fucking statement about ONE FUCKING THING that I can just visualise her saying in her fucking pompous tone omfg so angry, I don't even know how to respond without being sarcastically rude and scathing, fucking hell thanks for your input bitch.

So now not in the mood for 4u. Can dedicate the predictably dreary rainy day tomorrow to it. Might watch some old TVD with human Elena. I miss the way things used to be. In every aspect.

I need Friday.

Had lunch with matrix people and there must have been about two onions in those noodles, it was ridiculous. I probably smelt like onions all day.
Ugh class was boring, I feel good understanding but the topic itself is just not interesting at all. I guess acidic could be more applied to general knowledge kind of things like household items and our body systems but really, when am I ever going to need to know the concentration of metal ions or the amount of sulfate in fertiliser?

Got some edamame which reminds me that Anika had no idea how to eat beans yesterday looool shall spare her the embarrassment but it's doubtful that I'll forget what you did, Anika.

Yum, buffalo wings for dinner and I just want my sister to come back now with my clothes :( BUT she's going to Shanghai and other more tourist-y places for a week so hopefully can do some shopping there and get me my make up wheeee lipstick! It's annoying though because as soon as she's back, we're back in uniform so I can't even touch those clothes. HOPE FOR MUFTI LOOOOL.

The sky behind these huge clouds was just continually flashing, it was pretty eerie, but probably a thunderstorm far away.

Read an article on Australia's non-support for gay marriage. I do not understand the fucking insolence of Australian people and their stance on gay marriage. Before the main argument used to be fucking God and the church which wasn't 'acceptable' but more understandable but just the fact that it remains a social issue where people just can't accept the fact that saying they're married later may mean they could be mistaken for a homosexual just because the same fucking term is used oh my fucking god no words for my fury. It's not even worth a curse festival.

Anyway, cbf work, going to go and sort out my make up list for my sister. Need to cool down from all that rage.

Shitty shitty morning, but it's the middle of the week and I'm just counting down to the weekend.

I made myself a delicious spam and cheese toastie this morning and then made another one to take for lunch, but I forgot to pack it so I had to buy food :(

Little worth recounting. Class was boring, spent an hour on the stupid homework and we're just always going to be one dot point behind right now and this reminds (wtf why is that underlined red) me that I need to start chem notes along the way too omfg, maybe I'll join Michelle in the library after class now. Louise is the cutest things ever, I can't get over how crinkly and moon-y her eyes get, SHE'S SO ADORABLE. And I swear she would've been such a bad-ass when she was young, what with her tattoo and belly piercing. Plus you can see she had a really nice hourglass figure which is still recognisable. She needs to smuggle Norton in one day.

I studiously sat with my cold toastie to do chem and I did whatever I could of workbook 3 so hopefully tomorrow's work won't be overwhelming.

Then I did blogilates instead of Zumba and oh my god, wonder how I'm going to climb the escalators at Epping tomorrow. At one point, my mum came out to the corridor, maybe wondering what all these noises were. It would sound very much like strange aerobic porn.

So 4u is open but I'll make this excuse of practising my 'writing'. Just dreading it every time I open it because I'm stuck all over again and not even thinking about 3u creative. Maybe I'll do some chem notes. This is not a fucking holiday. Fucking bitches having fun. Actually lots of people are library-ing it and studying so that's probably the majority, so not suffering alone.

It's from now that we can technically count down a fortnight till school resumes. Oh well. Kinda miss it, it's almost preferable to matrix. Idek just so boring. HOWEVER I have spent majority of the day shopping but I'll get to that later.

Matrix was boring until the break where Louise and I were discussing pugs and she was talking about jugs (jack russels x pug) and Anika the idiot google imaged them and MMM WONDER WHAT SORT OF PHOTOS POPPED UP LOOOOOL. This module is stupid, acidic is comparatively awesome.

Ate dinner with mum at epping which was pretty good and very spicy, did not do wonders for my throat. And then I got yogurberry for dessert which tasted good since I haven't had froyo for basically a term, wow.

Was beginning matrix hw really late until my sister FaceTimed me and I saw my dad for the first time in years but omfg they were taking me virtual shopping omfg bought like seven shirts and a skirt dishsksbdksnh the only reason to go to Asia. But far out, their sephora needs to die. I spent half the day looking up cosmetics and made a pretty good list of heaps of stuff from MAC and NARS and tarte etc like BASIC brands and they had none of them except for Benefit fml. And then higher end ones which did not interest me, so fucking depressed. Might hop onto their online site and see what I can get.

Anyway might attempt one of the five long responses left in this fucking workbook and sleep cause its just too hard and annoying to complete.

Oh yeah, SUCK A FUCKING DICK.

Whoo school has essentially started again. Whoo. Far out, been so sick all weekend and today was just ridiculous, felt like there was a plug down my throat and in my ears but my nose was just running like a marathon. Didn't help that Anika and I slept pretty late kudos to our always amusing conversations. There was once an old lady who liked young ladies,

Measly amount of 4u done this morning (200 words lol) because Suk and I got to talking so yeah... and jokes, I'm stuck again and Winch is not replying with feedback to what I sent her.

Thankfully just made each bout of transport I had to catch to Stra and yay was nice seeing people again. I swear I hadn't seen Richard and Brandon in ages and it's pretty surreal to think school ended only a few days ago. Went to mojee as per usual and had a huge plate of beef to myself mm and yeah it was good catching up. Except curse Brandon, he must have telepathically transferred his ulcer cause now I have one :(

FML we moved classrooms and it's so gross and big and I miss our cosy natural-sun-lit room. God this unit is sooo boring, acidic is actually a dream in comparison. And I just kept sniffling anyway so it wasn't a good day. Talked to Sarah on the train about study and omfg, I was just wtf-ing the whole time because she was talking about her 11-hour tutor day and just all the UMAT prep she does and how her biggest fear is complacency with study... WHICH JUST HAPPENS TO BE MY LIFE. Honestly, perspective. Yes I care about HSC but some people need to be a bit more open-minded (how ironic from me). I'd be semi-satisfied to end up doing a first year art degree if my ATAR is shit, pass in that course and then get into whatever you can the second year.

So the rest of the week is going to be awful cold weather, which is going to do wonders for my cold. I feel like hell and I can't even miss one fucking day of matrix. It's essentially missing one week worth of chem lessons.

Miserable miserable holidays. I'll sleep at 3500 words.

First and last 'holidays' for me. I refuse to go out again, except maybe once idk, there's just too much work to think about.

Saturday:
Had to skip Joumana's cause dentist appointments always fall right in the middle of the day, but I did get to taste some of those brownies and cake later so didn't completely miss out, yum. Headed to Eric's afterwards and just sat myself down to 4u while he slept all afternoon. Wrote 500 words which brings me to 3000 and god I just cannot disappoint Dr Greene. CANNOT.

Drove to Rhodes for some super bad Thai food that we couldn't even finish and it was a bad idea to even eat so much, Jesus. Met up with Christine, Tanya, Anorah, Carla, Jina and Nayomi and headed over to the nice waterside park and play equipment. Awks though cause a kid came to the park with his parents so we just meekly left, but there were benches that gave a nice view of the water so that was good. Wow it was just so dark, legitimately saw nothing and LOL horrible luvos we tried to take with back camera and flash.

Baulko guys, and I still have no idea which ones came except for Allan lol and yeah, it was pretty fun, but I can't actually remember much. Fast forward to getting to Eric's which was a complete nightmare o m f g. LOL Carla did you think that we were going to the Bahamas omg could not stop laughing at Jina's comment. Maybe I was delirious. Not as much as Nayomi, who tried to walk from penno to castle.

Sunday:
Morning was bad. Everything smelt so bad and I didn't bring a towel so I had to dry myself with a shirt after showering, and it does not absorb water like towels. Tanya is such a cute sleeper. And Greg. I wanted to get devil wings and lots of them but just settled for instant noodles at home and attempts to recount the previous night.

Napped for quite a while after that, it was much needed and I was so furious when my mum forced me up to collect my stupid travel pass, sigh, which reminds me that matrix begins tomorrow and I just don't want the nightmare to begin.

Okay, gotta do 4u all morning till I have to leave the house for the next fortnight. Legitimately refuse to pull another all nighter for second draft, though at this rate, it seems very likely. But I further developed where my story is going at Eric's so hopefully, I won't be going through writing block like I was for the whole term basically.

Anyway, going to read and call it an early (earlier) night.

Been a while (for me) since I blogged. And it just feels like a lot has happened. Maybe it's just me.

Wednesday:
LOOOOL got English back. Just, ugh, felt so fucking disappointed but honestly, I don't know. Settling for complete mediocrity in advanced CAUSE I FUCKING HATE IT. It was not a great prelude to DROPPING LEGAL FUCKING YES best feeling of my life getting my timetable with thirteen frees omfg.
Maths was probably gay.
HAHA got eco back and it was uhm, bad but relatively good in terms of ranking I'm going to guess... I'm just so depressed my best mark is maths. Ext better be good, otherwise, killing myself.
Free but probably mucked around with Tanya.

After school was the textual dynamic talk with Drayton's son which was actually so interesting, and it's so strange how all these textual constrictions can make things easier. Irony.

Got home and slept from 6:30pm to 6:30am and it was actually amazing.

Thursday:
Eco first and Anika was away. IT'S ALWAYS THIS SAME DAY SHE'S AWAY. It was a good lesson though, discussing exchange rates which I really like and all. Fucking hindmarsh is probably enjoying how many euros he can buy with the high exchange rate.
Maths.
Did zero 4u. Instead, laughed over face bomb with Sandra Tanya and Ami omfg but then fucking Drybra ruined our fun and bashed Tanya for not starting society lol, such a bitch.
Finished Hamlet which was sad, and since we did not get much from Motherwell in terms of textual detail analysis etc, foreshadowing groupwork sigh.

Sent my sister off at the airport because the dumbass decided to go to China despite needing to study... Hate airports, the drive is unbearable. Anyway, went back home for a night much to my mother's despair hehe and watched a bit of Forrest Gump.

Friday:
Last day of term 1. Last day of summer uniform for class. Six months of year 12 gone. I can't deal with time passing.

Bleh slept in too long and showered too long so was pretty late for my date with Christine but turns out she was too so that worked out. Nayomi and Eric chimed and lol so much for my plan to do 4u while sipping my green tea latte. I love that fucking family room, it is the most adorable place. And discussed very disturbing things.
Watched Titanic in chem, and we only got to where he rescues her from the water. But stupid Gamble kept interjecting about the stupid artifacts and chemical reactions.
Eco gave us perspective on how little time we have left to study SO FUCKING MUCH. This is depressing. I don't want to leave.
Mentor at lunch with Motherwell being adorable as usual, trying to reassure us about HSC. I wonder if she does drink regularly.
Failed free in the empty cottage with 4u, and I'm so stressed after talking to Winch. Ugh, and all productivity failed when Tanya came so yeah. Jina had a stick insect. And we had interesting discussions about animal sex and asexual beings.

Excited for tomorrow. First and last break before matrix, which I still don't want to fucking go to because IT IS NOT POSSIBLE TO FIT IT ALONGSDE WITH SO MUCH 4U. IMPOSSIBLE.

Took another bath which had so many bubbles I thought it was going to spill over, though in the end, when there were no more bubbles, there was so little water...

So I opened 4u again and I just can't write it anymore, completely stuck and with no direction and I just don't want to disappoint Dr Greene fml why she gotta mark this :(

Whatever, tomorrow.

Sigh, missed midnight deadline.

Anyway, progressed a teeny bit with 4u, obviously not enough to satisfy Winch but I'm pretty pleased so whatever.

Chem first LOOOL did horribly but I console myself with the fact that lots of people didn't do too well.
House choir fml listened to Suk's beautiful voice the whole time and Fun has been in my head alllll day.
Didn't get anything back in English, but I'm bracing myself for tomorrow lol. Nearly done with Hamlet. This saddens me. Last Shakespeare ever.
Talked to Dr Turner at lunch and he finally convinced me to drop the fuck out of legal so I was running to Drayton and then she was like no. Tomorrow. So I had to attend legal last period.

Replaced my phone after school, feels so nice and new.

Did nothing ALLLLL DAY. So I'm going to sleep after this.

Scared for English and eco tomorrow. And then incursion with Drayton's son after school, sigh. It's okay, I will be dropping legal and it will be the most wonderful feeling, though I will miss Herschell and Rachel.

JOKES CAN MAKE THIS, BYE!

Can't believe it is only Monday. Obviously very out of whack with school and we really have just bad luck. I mean, we could have done assessments early, and kind of attempted to the next fortnight of school within a week, or finish assessments in last term fortnight like Baulko. But no, we're just stuck in between, and as soon as we kind of get back into class rhythm, it's fucking holidays. Though not for us poor holiday course kids.

Anyway, purposefully slept in on discovering that chem was first period, but then the bus was just ridiculously slow anyway. Discovered that chem results are coming back tomorrow. Fucking to the yay. Great way to begin first period. Ditto with tomorrow.
Got our concession cards lol what poor timing. Carla's old one wouldn't have had to be ripped if we'd gotten it three days earlier. And it was just nice to see everybody again. I mean, last time was for Mod A exam.
Free because Winch isn't here for mentor (thank god) and just talked about random things with Ravie and Tanya.
Ugh started Calvino in English which is just too soon and I haven't even read the book nor do I want to at this rate. Motherwell has lost soooo much weight, that fruit/veg diet must really work. Anyway, slacked off for the last half hour so Tanya, Jess, Anika and I made a line-by-line story but we only managed 8 lines by the time the bell went. It was still pretty fucking hilarious. Going to do it again.
Confirmed my hatred for legal last period and yeah. I need it gone.

Ran for a devil wing with Jina and Jenny, it was delicious, all that oily goodness. And fun bus ride with Zack and Chrus.

I'm pretty terrified for results tomorrow. Chem was actually just horrible, and since I did so mediocre in the first assessment, nothing can save me. Maths CANNOT BE BAD ELAINE OMFG STUDIED MY ASS OFF FOR IT. And we failed first assessment so again, no safety net. Only bet is eco. First assessment was fine but this time, there was such a huge range of results, there's no predicting how I did. Also getting legal back Friday but I planned to have dropped by then. And then it's English left...

Yeah had a huge fight/discussion with the parents about dropping to ten units. Honestly, mum, you don't fucking understand anything THINGS HAVE CHANGED AND IT'S NOT NARROWED DOWN TO WHATEVER THE FUCK YOU GO ON ABOUT. So even after finally getting that permission note, I'm so hesitant again. So much to prove to everyone, myself included, if I drop. Time to mourn to Dr Turner tomorrow.

Alright focusing on 4u tonight.

Okay it's been a good weekend. Seriously, been relaxing so hard I've forgotten about exams and getting results back.

Saturday:
Forced myself up early to shower and receive Carla at my humble abode but I was cbf to leave early so we just chilled and watched the Best of Joey for an hour or something. And then we left lol just when it started to drizzle yay.

Bus to city and idk just crawled around all these shops and everything and actually bought some stuff! Got myself a pinky-nude lipstick at Topshop. Then went to General Pants somewhere and got a nice black leopard-y print denim button up for only $30 whoo I love sales. Picked up some sheet masks which were so expensive wtf. And then lastly went to Glue and got a Henley's crop for only $15 yay. And somehow still not very satisfied with all my purchases, even though I spent a considerable amount.

Met up with Christine, Nayomi and Eric and split up, getting VERY lost on the way but after being ten minutes late for our booking, WE FINALLY ARRIVED AT SUMINOYA. But of course Tanya was late so we ordered without her and omfg had to simultaneously give her directions to the restaurant whilst cooking my wagyu. Which was fucking delicious omfg everything was just orgasmic. Except we were pretty much gone within half an hour but since ordering time is only an hour, had to persevere. It didn't taste as good as it did a year ago. Oh my god, this poor waiter asked Tanya something and he legitimately repeated himself five times because we couldn't understand and us three were just outright laughing at him, I felt so bad but could not help myself.

Trekked down to Darling Harbour and met up with Carla and Eric again and just found a place away from people because they were all watching fireworks. Still no idea why they were going off... Yeah just had fun but omfg so many mosquito bites, 9 on one leg. Chilled for a few hours and then was so relieved to wash off the beef smoke/alcohol smell off of me. Can't say the same for my bed because I didn't wash my hair oops.

Sunday:
Trying to forget about the upcoming week of school and just focus on more relaxing.

Lol I attempted to sort out my exam sheets and notes etc. The furthest I got was splitting things into their respective subject piles and leaving it at that. Then I spent the day reading and Facetiming and eating. Thus it's been a pretty good day.

OMFG FOUND OUT ALL THIS INFORMATION ABOUT JAKE FROM YANNICK DFLKSNHDOFJISDOHJLS apparently he's shy. That is so adorable. Going to visit woolies where he works with Carla ASAP. Preparing myself to discover his name.

I need to exercise, especially after last night, but cbf zumba so I'm watching a blogilates video to see how much it will injure me. Very doubtful in its ability to have a big effect on the body. Might end up resorting to zumba anyway. Or both, need to get into a good mindset because I will not want to exercise in winter :(

Alright, 4u afterwards. Yay for school.

EXAMS. ARE. OVER.

God, last minute study failed. Everyone just kind of accepted their doom which was very reassuring. And god I swear time just DRAGGED ON AND ON. I just took my sweet time on multiple choice. At least they made it amusing to use our class names in the questions. What was stupid though was that I struggled hard with the question with MY NAME. And then I just ignored the crime question and did the family paper which I managed five pages of! And that was only for marriage, not even de facto. And then I bs'd two pages for crime LOL LOST FIFTEEN MARKS BUT WHO CARES. Legit euphoric when I exited the hall omfg.

Retail therapy commenced with Herschell and Tanya. Spent a good hour at Ice because so many fucking sales omfg bought a maxi skirt, and a black skirt and a shirt and Tanya and Herschell each bought a pair of supposedly comfortable wedges that Tanya eventually tripped in. Sportsgirl next and just raided the knits. And got a maroon pair :) lol Herschell and I were already broke by then. Decided to stop there, I'll go some time with my mum again. Met up with Eric and got some pad Thai for lunch, so delicious. And then I bought a pink penguin book! Except the range was so limited and I'd already had all the books so I resorted to Anais Nin, even though I'm not a particular fan of explicit sexual content (though it may seem otherwise) just cause I've got to have a pink penguin.

Drove to Castle and picked up Richard cause powers lines were down at normo lol how convenient. Omfg then we waited a good twenty minutes outside the library for Carla but ended up having to drop Tanya off at the bus stop, who thankfully remembered her doctors appointment last minute.

Got to Carla's and ate lots of fruit and then put on Win a Date With Tad Hamilton which Eric surprisingly enjoyed. Shake-a-doo, Josh Duhamel is fucking fine. Shared some udon with Eric and fought over the tiny bits of it remaining in the soup. I must say my chopstick skills have dramatically improved since Year 9. Anyway, got home in time for my mum to leave with my dog so we went for a walk and it just stank of dirt the whole time.

Mm had a very nice bubble bath while reading Murakami I CAN FINALLY READ IT HAS BEEN TOO FUCKING LONG.

So excited for tomorrrow. City day shopping with Carla and then Suminoya with Christine, Tanya and Nayomi and then more fun later with Carla and Eric again whoooo. And then it's back to study. I even have my 4u open now, just cause it's about time to get a move on with it.

Alright, goodbye exams. Thanks for the stressful fortnight. Another one forecasted for the holidays, fml matrix.

TOODLES.

Whoo last night before last half yearly exam and I've spent the majority of it with Herschell, lamenting on how screwed we are and idealizing post HSC.

Legitimately not studying legal and dropping. Fml why did I tell drayton I would try, should've just dropped this weeks ago. But there's just so much fucking content anyway that if I did try, I would've failed and then ended up dropping anyway. So obviously all the signs are pointing to me dropping this.

Lol I love Herschell. Miss having maths and chem with her. OMG NO CLASSES WITH HERSCHELL IF I DROP LEGAL. Wow this is so sad. But it's okay, because I'll always find her in the cottage kitchen :)

Alright she just gave up and went to sleep. My turn now. We will be free in 11 hours. With retail therapy scheduled.

If it were not for fucking legal, I would be having the time of my life right now. Looking over Eric's crime notes just confirms how badly I'm going to fail it because of my zero knowledge of anything Karnups tried to teach. WHY IS IT FRIDAY I CAN'T GET OVER THIS, IT'S LIKE A SECOND HOLIDAY RIGHT NOW FROM THE WEEKEND.

Got to school to see Nicholas Cage plastered all over the cottage. I don't know why they picked him, he's very handsome. Except for those photos, jesus. And I officially hate Michelle all over again. THAT'S RIGHT BITCH, HOW DARE YOU DROP CHEM AND THEN DROP EXT ENGLISH?

Speech was not horrifying, though I felt like fainting most of the time because Foster and Marriot did not stop staring... there was nowhere to look. But I was just short of 4 minutes and stumbled a bit at the timer but otherwise, I'm really praying to get 10+ lol.

English was just scary. Honestly, you'd figure writing the essay seven times would let it sink in. Idk, because half the practice essay was all the stuff about reader involvement and the question (like I semi-predicted) focused a lot more on composition so I ended up cutting a lot from the essay which meant that if I didn't, I definitely would not have finished. It wasn't a difficult question, but pretty sure I didn't exactly answer it adequately so just aiming for 21.5. Then Anika shouted me some macarons and my mum picked me up and gave me the Wonka showbag my sister got me :)

Oh my god. Spent the evening reading and finishing Clockwork Princess. Literally lay there in emotional turmoil trying to decide how I felt about the ending. Honestly it was going to be bad either way but the actual scenario never even occurred to me. And now... I just can't reread it, knowing what happens to the characters later. I CAN'T READ IT AGAIN AND I LOVE IT SO MUCH LSDKJLAKSHDLJL. Fucking tragic. Not even erotic detail. Same disappointment will occur again with City of Heavenly Fire. Just make Jace and Clary have sex ONCE OKAY. AND GIVE ME DETAIL.

Vampire Diaries after and apparently it's a 3 week hiatus till the next episode, which is penultimate to the season finale. So they're going to torture us for another six months or something. JUST LIKE PLL. Means I'll have to revert to watching Carrie Diaries which I've neglected for six episodes.

So maybe I should just print out Eric's notes without editing, because it's futile either way. And then get back into study tomorrow. Such a joykill :( Bright side though, Suminoya on Saturday after Joumana's! But without Carla, slut. Oh well, we'll eat her share in meat and seaweed. Salivating just thinking about it.

Toodles.

Slept 12 hours today i.e. woke at noon.

Ugh so spent the day rewriting ext essay four times and recording my speech and trying to rest my hand in preparation tomorrow.

I don't know if it was from stress or just idk illness but I had the second nosebleed of my life and it was horrifying to see blood, though equally fascinating.

Okay I cut down my essay to 1540 words. Now I should start rewriting it.

Not even going to think about the speech anymore. As long as I don't vomit/cry/faint.

Okay.