La Vie en Rose

Monday, October 31, 2011

surreal

Back to school! It was lots of fun, or maybe I just missed everybody. I did sleep in though, but I dreamed that I was rushing to school. Like premonition.

Food tech was first and we had to pay one mofo dollar to borrow a uniform for twenty minutes. ONE DOLLAR I TELL YOU. It was ridiculous, and we made cookie dough TT Then our exams were handed out and holy mother, I did so awful I wanted to cry. And then Davies is like, all this stuff in the exam was from the classes you were chatting in. Thanks bitch.

Sport was our last sport lesson and my class' last time in sport uniform :( But slapstick hockey was lots of fun, except I should've warmed up, because I pulled something while swinging.

I've discovered I'm going to do really bad for SC, evident through the science practice one. Have to revise all our Year 9 stuff again omguacamole.

Maths, I got my result back which was bad but I was expecting worse. We did 4 quizzes, where I progressively got worse. I don't know what I'd do without a calculator.

Tomorrow, we should be getting back history, commerce and English. It's going to be a horrible day.

Apparently, the Breaking Dawn sex scene got an R-rating which I find hilarious. But the trailer was pretty saucy (LOL) so yeah, it's probably understandable. That scene isn't even supposed to be shown ffs.

Sigh, got to do commerce now, and I think I might as well do Matrix work. I hope it starts getting enjoyable, and I might consider moving classes with Anika, but I like Wednesdays to be free :( And we all want to start hip hop classes! Except me and Tanya also want to do Latin ballroom, so we might start that together (Y)

Day 8 - A quote from an actor

"Love the life you live. Live the life you love." - Bob Marley

5:15 PM

Sunday, October 30, 2011

That's your misfortune

I've been waking up unusually early. And I've been home so long, going to school feels so foreign. We've actually got to study for SC this week, because it'll be so depressing for any of us to fail. Speaking of, I'm sure I've failed the exams we've got back already. Bleh bleh bleh.

So I fell asleep before Gone With the Wind started last night so I woke up and thankfully, it was on. So I have been watching it all afternoon and now there's a documentary on its creation, so altogether, it's about 6 hours TV. Sigh. My dream of dancing with Rhett Butler just died when they said he couldn't dance and there was some gliding platform under them to make them look smoother. But he's still so sexy. He was wearing this coat, and his shoulders were massive!

Anyway, I love this weather. It's so pleasant, it's so nice not to be cold and stiff and bundled up.

Day 7 - An inspirational quote

"Try and fail, but don't fail to try." - Stephen Kaggwa

3:43 PM

Saturday, October 29, 2011

Our duet

Hello.

I think, in total, I have watched about 8 hours worth of TV, and now I'm waiting for Gone With the Wind which is almost 4 hours long. My eye sight is going to deteriorate.

It was so warm today and watermelon is my life. But now the mosquitoes are coming out and they're only biting me and I'm so itchy. Far out I have nothing to say. Ever.

Vampire Diaries is just so, oh my goodness. Why does everything have to get so complicated in everything? Like, I was rereading Hush Hush and the events there compared to Silence is like whoa ho. Ditto like, Twilight and Vampire Academy and there were several other examples in my mind which I appear to have forgotten or think it unworthy to mention.

I want to fall in love while I'm dancing with my future man.

Day 6 - A quote about life

"Life can either be accepted or changed. If it is not accepted, it must be changed. If it is not changed, then it must be accepted."

9:21 PM

Friday, October 28, 2011

Ignorance is bliss

Skipped my third school day in a row and I have to face interrogation by Mr Hatton on Monday. It's ridiculous. I feel lonely. I miss my friends.
And they got geography and maths today which was apparently pretty shit and Palgan said English was terrible. I can't believe I was actually remotely confident with myself. Disappointment hits hard.

Matrix wasn't terrible. I think it's because I kept up today (Y)

Anyway, yeah okay nothing to talk about. Life is too messy to think about. Except that's all I ever do. I should find a life.

Ceebs to watch Vampire Diaries tonight. I was just remembering in the beginning of the show, it was actually about writing in diaries etc but they said now, Elena and Stefan are each other's diaries so yeah. Not that it's even remotely focused on that now. This season SUCKS MY NON-EXISTENT BALLS.

How do I love thee? Let me count the ways. I love thee to the depth and breadth and height my soul can reach when I'm feeling all alone.
Why am I reciting Emily Browning...

Day 5 - A quote about the future
"The past is a regret, the future an experiment." - Mark Twain

9:34 PM

Thursday, October 27, 2011

vulgarity

Sigh, today was awful. I hate hospitals. And we got science back and Me and Christine were thoroughly disappointed. Not wanting my results anymore. And then I realised I calculated wrong early and I can only lose 3 marks to beat Ricky in history. Sighhhhhh.

I would totally skip school tomorrow, but we're getting maths and I have fucking tutor, fuck my life. I HATE IT.

I just read an article about how shockingly difficult the Maths Ext. 1 HSC was and that it just keeps getting harder and harder. This is not my day. Or my year.

Day 4 - A quote about family

"Happy families are all alike. Every unhappy family is unhappy in its own way." - Leo Tolstoy

I like this one too. "A tree is known by its fruit."

3:56 PM

Wednesday, October 26, 2011

burn baby, burn

Today was a drag.

Was allowed to skip school today, so that's what I did (Y) But I got super angry in the morning so I threw my phone at the wall and now there's a crack along the screen. Sigh. It felt good though. Oh my, two packets of mi goreng for breakfast. I had no idea how much that really was till I looked at the heap on my bowl.

So the rest of my day consisted of Sex and the City, Gene Kelly and Valentine's Day twice consecutively. I still like the atmosphere of the movie, despite its incredible shitty-ness. AH I love this song. CAN YOU FEEL THIS MAGIC IN THE AIR? The atmosphere of America is also so much more livelier than here. I'd love to celebrate any holiday anywhere but here.

Far out, I was attempting stupid Matrix work. I do not understand why I can't do it. I'm not learning anything from the fucking class. I think I'm going to quit after one term, this is ridiculous.

How. Fucking. Dare. You. Think about this quote, bitch. True friends stab you in the front. Maybe you should learn.

Day 3 - A quote about friendship

"Sometimes you put walls up not to keep people out, but to see who cares enough to break them down."

8:28 PM

Tuesday, October 25, 2011

Prove it.

What a shitty day.

Firstly, the hot weather left us and I didn't listen to my mum's advice of wearing a jumper so I froze all day. Along with many others though, so that's okay. Rhyme (Y) The mother fucking bus, I DO NOT UNDERSTAND THE MEANING OF A FUCKING ICE CUBE OF A BUS IN THE MORNING AND A FUCKING HOT SHITTY DEFINITION OF HUMIDITY IN THE AFTERNOON FOR FUCK'S SAKES.

Then I realised I should've jigged the entire day, because English was unbearable, writing a mofo interview. Maths was guh, I do not understand functions or the purpose of it. Where will we ever see it, I do not know. Oh I jigged commerce with Audrey in the library though (Y) I love the privileges that come with this uniform. Except I spent most of the time watching An Affair to Remember discreetly, WHILE managing to finish maths hw. History wasn't terrible, we just did more practice school certs, because apparently, our multiple choice is horrible. And I calculated I can only afford to lose 8 marks to beat Ricky, and I've probably already lost half of that in multiple choice. Sigh.

Oh yes, fuck you. And why you TT

I still feel so lost without exams to study for. My life is such a waste, somebody else can just take it.

I'm attempting to get accustomed with my heels again, because now I'm not so sure how long I'll survive in them for. So I've been hobbling around for a few hours now because it started dying after the first one. Sigh, things have changed. Lol, what trivial things.

Time to waste more of my life.

Day 2 - A quote about love.

"Love comes unseen; we only see it go." - Austin Dobson

7:45 PM

Monday, October 24, 2011

30-Day Quote Challenge

Day 01- Favorite quote
Day 02- A quote about love
Day 03- A quote about friendship
Day 04- A quote about family
Day 05- A quote about the future
Day 06- A quote about life
Day07- An inspirational quote
Day 08- Quote from an actor
Day 09- Quote from an actress
Day 10- Quote from a solo artist
Day 11- Quote from a band member
Day 12- A quote about fashion/style
Day 13- Quote from a book
Day 14- Quote from favorite author
Day 15- Quote from a movie
Day 16- Quote from a tv show
Day 17- Quote your favorite lyrics
Day 18- An anonymous quote
Day 19- Quote from a headstrong female
Day 20- Quote you would write on your bedroom wall
Day 21- Quote you would want inscribed in your wedding ring
Day22- Quote that reminds you of someone
Day 23- Favorite Disney movie quote
Day 24- Quote that makes you smile
Day 25- Quote that reminds you of sadness
Day 26- Quote you’d want on a tshirt
Day 27- Quote that describes you
Day 28- A quote you made up
Day 29- The first quote you saw today
Day 30- Whatever quote you like

Day 1 - Favourite quote

'If you don't know where you're going, any road will get you there.' - Lewis Carroll

6:20 PM

sharp

Summer has come.

And it's going again. Wednesday is only around 20 degrees, and I must say, I'm quite grateful. I hate sweating in uniform. I WANT SUMMER HOLIDAYS. Anyway, the weekend was just so relaxing, minus dress shopping, I totally forgot about school till Christine reminded me last night.

LOL we spent the bus ride going through Jiani's album of Christine party and laughing our asses off. Seriously, these are the most horrendous photos, there's one of each person. We were mainly laughing at Eric's.

English first which was another practice School Cert, which me and Christine did pretty badly in. I don't understand, it's actually really difficult for me. Or I'm just underdeveloped. Or uneducated.

ZUMBA was so much fun, but we sweated so much. Me and Michelle's freestyle chest pump y'all (Y)

It was Ms Smyth's birthday on Saturday so Joumana bought a cake and we hid in the classroom and gave Ms Smyth a really fail surprise LOL. Sigh, two more weeks. We did a school cert. which was also incredibly bad, especially the short responses, oh my. Have to revise Year 9 stuff.

Fuck, maths was just fucking guh. I do not understand functions. And I was really looking forward to getting some results back but all the teachers are still marking.

I found my bus pass!

I'm just going to do this random challenge I found. Also, I saw a Book Thief challenge, which was a mild surprise. Unfortunately, I don't care enough for the book to do it. Ooh, there's also a TVD one. I'll post the quote on in another post.

5:56 PM

Sunday, October 23, 2011

Fuck. You.

You know who you are.

10:50 PM

How do you know

I GOT MY FORMAL DRESS. My mum and I spent three hours at Myer, and everything was so cheap, but I cbf to look at normal clothes. At last. Now I only got to worry about, y'know, shoes that fit and a matching clutch and how to get my hair and make up done, which I might just do all professionally. And Keshani's party. And the three weeks of mufti. Sigh, this would be so much easier if I was a dude.

My sister's playing Enchanted. I'm really obsessed with the songs now. Thank god, because there's no exams to study for! Oh but I'll probably revise geography and history for SC anyway, because I really can't wing anything without having a panic attack.

Apparently, I'm sexually attracted to books.

8:31 PM

Influence

Hoi guise.

So yesterday, I fell asleep on a book for about 5 hours so sleeping last night was, indeed, a bitch. So yeah, I don't know what I was doing. I don't know what I'm doing now. My mum is gonna take me dress shopping though :) But the trip will be 90% unsuccessful and I'm going to come home very angry.

I printed the sheet music for So Close, and it's bloody hard. Or I'm just really out of practice, but fark there are like, so many flats and sharps to consider and bleh, that was only the right hand. I'm also afraid I may stop liking the song if I have to slave through trying to perfect it.

Nothing is ever quite true.

11:17 AM

Saturday, October 22, 2011

The end of the fairy tale

Hello. Isn't this weather glorious? I am basking in this pre-summer bliss. Because my parents finally bought a watermelon and it is so delicious.

I understand why I'm so sad about exams ending. Yes, I actually am, and if you don't like listening to a bunch of existentialism shit, I suggest moving on.

Huh, there's not much to say about that. Just studying for exams gave me a purpose in life, and now that they're over, I'm feeling lost. Things just lose their appeal. In this case, trivialities like TV and internet. I'll always have books. But I woke up this morning, thinking that this is my first free weekend in weeks. Then I wondered what the hell am I supposed to do with it? So I was lying in bed, mulling over my unfulfilled life. Then during breakfast, my mum decided to bring up the indecency of human beings, which made me contemplate how much I truly do not want to leave my last little bit of security and enter the world of greed more than I already have. Then I was reading and hating how people from a world that has become so corrupt, can create such ideal characters and stories of what we should be like, but never will be.

Fuck. I'm supposed to be celebrating. But there's nothing to celebrate.

What the world needs is a return to sweetness and decency.

3:47 PM

Friday, October 21, 2011

It's happening.

10:36 PM

partyin' partying'

YEAH!

Exams are over. Whatever remained of my life before resumes. I'm still quite baffled as to why it's sad for me, because today was pretty horrible in terms of examination but I love exam leave and guh I do not want to return to lessons.

Well last night, my sister gave up on testing me for commerce when I started singing the Subway peri chicken song. Thanks Michelle. So I stopped and, praying for a miracle, I slept my with notes under my pillow LOL. It didn't work, I nearly forgot to bring them this morning. I spent more of the night worrying about mufti.

So I was having a panic attack in the morning, trying to cram in commerce and food tech and turns out heaps of people didn't study for food tech anyway so that was reassuring. The exam was ridiculously hard for a food tech exam. Iono, just waffled on with bullshit.

Commerce. Stupid Anika made an acronym for something but she got the letters arranged INCORRECTLY and a question was based on that so I got it wrong and she got it right, THAT LITTLE BITCH. I WILL MAKE YOU PAY ANIKA.

Oh my god, I swear when the teacher announced the end of the exam, my chest just suddenly felt so incredibly light because examinations were fucking over.

There were about seven of us; Anika, Audrey, Christine, Jess, Sylvia, Wendy. Attempted looking for more formal dresses but there was nothing, but I found quite a nice one in Myer. Except my ass was too big. Yeah I don't know. I need to stop saying that.

Headed to Strathfield, some of us got Moochi nomnom. I got some spicy rice thing, THEN I had Moochi which was an extremely bad combination for my stomach. Not to mention some corn dog Christine didn't want that was like biting into a solid form of oil. We met Gabriel, who doesn't know what a corsage is.

Chem class was sooo boring, we got some sub who is gay or has an unfortunate pitch of voice. Bleh, Matrix sucks. It seriously sucks shit. We don't even learn much, and Franco could've totes sat next to me if Anika had thought to move to Christine LOL. Noob. The quiz at the end was horrible, the teacher just ended up telling us the answers anyway. Oh and I lost my train and bus pass, fuck my life.

So now, I am loading Pretty Little Liars and Vampire Diaries and I'm so excited! But it's gonna. Shows progressively get worse. Exhibit A - Gossip Girl.

This is my first relaxing weekend in who knows how long. BYE GUYS.

8:49 PM

Thursday, October 20, 2011

Burden

Lol I'm going to fail commerce and food tech so miserably. Not that the latter concerns me greatly. I can't wait to drop food tech.

Sigh I don't know, I'm kinda not as celebratory as I expected now that exams are basically over. TBH I like exam week! Like, it's preferable to school lessons. I absolutely despise post exam period. I am the definition of laziness. And I think I've said this before, but I like stressing with my friends :)

Anyway today was PE exam. It was at the end of the day so I got to wake up at 7:30. It was heavenly. My mum was singing in the car on the way to Penno station. It was terrible. Met up with Jess and Jina at Westfield and then Audrey, Sylvia and Christine joined us later. We attempted to find stuff for formal and Keshani's and general mufti. It was a hopeless attempt. Ever since that horrible Parramatta trip with Carla to find dresses for food and fashion and Abi's, I have been completely turned off from shopping. Bleh.

The exam was pretty bad, we'd spent the whole hour before memorizing first aid and there were two multiple choice questions on it, far out. And WTF, I have no idea how cyber bullying just fit in. Yeah whatever. Two exams left (Y)

So I really can't understand commerce and legal proceedings and I am so repulsed by the fact that
I'm taking legal studies. I'm seriously considering switching to physics, which is a suicide mission for me.

Mufti tomorrow TT I hate mufti but it's going to be hot so yeah. It was really warm today, and the senior uniform doesn't reduce feeling hot.

Fuck you. I can't believe you're doing this to me. ME. You're a fucking douche. Have a nice life.

9:03 PM

Wednesday, October 19, 2011

Romantic dreams must die

Good morning starshine. The earth says hello! Except it's not good morning so. Yeah.

MATHS IS FUCKING OVER. My life restarts. And by that, it means talking to the same people and reading the same books over and over.

Anyway, yeah, last night was cramming with Christine. Three papers took me, God knows how long. I finally finished like, half past midnight. I swear, those English nerves returned, I felt so sick for maths. However, we got into the exam and it wasn't half bad. Seriously, this is what's happening this semester, and it worries me that I'm jinxing myself, because there's no way it was easy because I was prepared. No.

I seriously love exam leave. It was so nice and sunny walking home. Then I got home and watched Ellen and TVD and Enchanted. Sigh. I don't know what to do with myself. But oh my god, I was just replaying the ball scene and waltzing around by myself, imagining Patrick Dempsy's arms around me, singing in my ear. AH. I need to stop doting on fictional characters. I'll never be satisfied with my life otherwise.

I think I'll get Jess to go shopping with me tomorrow or something before PE exam. Meaning I have to study that tonight. Sigh I hate mufti. Apparently, Monday might reach 30 degrees. The fucking day we have sport, fuck my life. I don't understand these inconveniences.

Shiet, gotta pay my formal deposit and life and resilience. Guh so much money gone.

Meh, PE can wait.

I've decided that catastrophizing things is very healthy for me.

4:11 PM

Tuesday, October 18, 2011

This one's not pretend

I like exam leave :)

Anyway, science was today and guh, we spent so much time memorising all this evolution and genetics shit and there were about 5 questions on it. Such a waste of time. But surprisingly, and thankfully, it was quite simple. Much better than I expected, but we always catastrophise things during times of panic. I'm worried I'm setting myself up for more disappointment though.

Anyway, I got home before noon. That's when I would've woken up in the holidays. Sigh, they feel like so long ago. Then I watched Ellen Degeneres and Logan Lerman was on the show EHEHEHEHE he was so adorable I wanted to jump into the TV and eat him. I have to finish The Three Musketeers before I watch his movie though. GUH I WANT TO READ.

So now, I feel too relaxed because I can't be bothered to start maths. Ugh I cannot wait for this week to be over.

I want to read.

1:25 PM

Monday, October 17, 2011

That famous happy end

Sigh. I actually shouldn't be sighing because to be very honest, exams were not as bad as I was making it out to be. Let's start with last night though. I was so confused with English so I rage quit around midnight and took a long time to sleep because I think I was visualizing terrible scenarios of the exam.

Anyway I attempted studying quotes during breakfast, on the way to the bus stop, on the bus, at the station and then I pretty much gave up then. It was a good thing everyone was freaking out about the same as me, otherwise I wouldn't puked. No joke, I was so nervous I felt pale. Anyway, the actual exam, was surprisingly not as hard. Still hard, but didn't math my expectations thank goodness. I was sitting next to Alison so I felt so discouraged but I managed to get through multiple choice and short answer quite quickly, though short answers were shockingly hard and then the essays weren't great, but I finished everything (Y)

Oh god, I was so hungry during the exam, I think people could hear my stomach so I stuffed down two sandwiches while cramming history and geography. The actual exam, again, was not terrible, but geography was very difficult, but I just dozed for the last ten minutes anyway.

I haven't started any work till now, I need to rewrite all off the half yearly stuff minus chemistry. I take back my earlier confidence with science. Speaking of, I don't understand why the Matrix work is so hard for me. I'll have to get answers from everyone later.

Inspirational songs piss me off if the whole purpose of the song is to try and inspire. It should just come along with the song, if that makes sense.

Huh I feel like finding a challenge.

I can't wait for the weekend. I'm going to borrow books and read my life out.

8:04 PM

Sunday, October 16, 2011

Struggle

Sigh, fuck my life, fuck me dead. WHY AM I HERE :(

Well, Christine woke me up again this morning, but thankfully it was about maths so I was forced to get up. But then during breakfast, Anika called me about maths. Like seriously, Audrey did yesterday as well. I SUCK AT MATHS GUYS. But I got Anika's parabola question correct (Y)

However, that confidence died when me and Christine did the 2008 and 2009 past paper. They were so fucking hard, holy shit. I just gave up. And then I attempted geography but I was so bored so I waxed my legs and now I'm attempting English again. I'm thinking I'll just do something else rn, and leave the subjects that we got tomorrow for the evening, so it'll be fresher in my mind or something.

It's such a beautiful day, I'm fucking stuck inside. But I did try study geography outside, but it was so nice and sunny and my dog was chasing lizards so I was mesmerised by her cuteness. I wish I was my dog. Idc about being bored, because if she wouldn't really know what it's like. Actually she does, I never play with her anymore. Meh.

Yesterday, I ate an entire takeaway box of pad thai.

Anyway, I'm hoping somebody is less prepared than me. Maybe like, a whole class of failures to boost my self-esteem.

Fuck okay, I will do geography again. Or English.

2:29 PM

Saturday, October 15, 2011

FU Audrey

1. Think of the last person who said I love you, do you think they meant it?
Is it sad I don't even remember who said that? Nobody loves me.

2. Would you date an 18-year-old at the age you are now?
Why not?

3. When’s the last time you were aggravated and happy at the same time?
I have been like this ever since I knew how these emotions felt.

4. Would you ever smile at a stranger?
Of course, I usually do, if I eye-contact them for a long time.

5. Is there someone mad because you’re dating/talking to the person you are?
Probably. Teenagers are such drama queens.

6. Have you heard a song that reminds you of someone today?
All songs make me nostalgic, but I can't really think of one because ABBA is on the music channel my mum is watching.

7. What exactly are you wearing right now?
Singlet, jacket and shorts. I haven't worn shorts in so long!

8. How often do you listen to music?
Purposefully, not often. I can actually live without an ipod, because I'm not retarded.

9. Do you wear jeans or sweats more?
Sweats. I like comfort.

10. Do you think your life will change dramatically before 2012?
I hope nothing dramatic happens in the last few months of 2011.

11. Are you a social or an antisocial person?
This question would require a long, unnecessary answer on introversion and extroversion, which nobody wants to hear. They wouldn't understand anyway.

12. Have you ever kissed someone whose name begins with the letter ‘A’?
Audrey EW.

13. What about ‘R’?
Richard.

14. Can you drive a stick shift?
You can imagine what dirty thoughts are going through my head, though it hardly makes sense.

15. Do you care if people talk badly about you?
It's natural to, and yes. Then I'd retaliate.

16. Are you going out of town soon?
I'm going Hamilton Island right after term ends and then China next year. Oh, the joy. Directed at the China trip of course. I hate going there.

17. When was the last time you cried?
I was either watching Love Story, or I may have been laughing recently.

18. Have you ever told someone you loved them?
I actually don't know, maybe in a jokingly manner, but not seriously. Which doesn't mean to a guy, but even genuinely to a friend in person. Too moist.

19. If you could change your eye color, would you?
If asians could ever look nice with blue or green eyes. But black eyes sound so cool. Literally black.

20. Is there a boy who you would do absolutely everything for?
Jokes, forever alone.

21. Name something you dislike about the day you’re having.
I was being extremely productive from 1-4pm and I haven't been since.

22. Is it cute when guys kiss you on your forehead?
Well, I just think if you're hair is in the way, it's probably gross, but if it's acted out, then it looks good.

23. Are you dating the last person you talked to?
No, I think Richard would rather date someone else ;)

24. What are you sitting on right now?
Nothing, gravity is on holiday.

25. Does anyone regularly (other than family) tell you they love you?
No :(

26. Have you ever wanted someone you couldn’t have?
Yes. The woes of life and love.

27. Who was the last person you talked to before you went to bed last night?
Ricky.

28. Do you get a lot of colds?
LOL all the bloody time. But I haven't had a proper one for a while, so I must be getting stronger (Y)

29. Where is the shirt you are wearing from?
It's a singlet. Somewhere cheap.

30. Does anyone hate you?
With my attitude, I'm not surprised if anyone does.

31. Do you have any empty alcohol bottles hidden somewhere in your room?
Yeah, but I was discovered this morning.

32. Do you like watching scary movies?
No thank you. I do not like to scar myself, I don't understand why anybody wants to shit their pants and lose sleep over some psychopathic idea brought to life.

33. Do you want your tongue pierced?
No fuck, I will rip it out.

34. If you had to delete one year of your life completely, which would it be?
Year 7 definitely. Fucking nightmare.

35. Did you have a dream last night?
Yes, I think it was a nice one till it was rudely interrupted.

36. When was the last time you told someone you loved them?
I never say this. So nobody ever says it to me LOL.

37. Do you think you’ll be married in 5 years?
I'll only be 20, halfway through my degree. No time for men!

38. Do you think someone has feelings for you?
Jokes.

39. Do you think someone is thinking about you right now?
I wish I had that sort of confidence.

40. Did you have a good day yesterday?
It was an unimpressive day.

41. Think back 2 months ago; were you in a relationship?
Nup.

42. In the next 48 hours, will you hang out with a girl?
Everybody in my family is of the female species, except like, 5 men.

43. Has anyone told you they don’t want to ever lose you?
Yes.

44. What’s the best part about school?
The environment, friends, some lessons. Yes Audrey, Ms fucking Smyth.

45. Do you have any pictures on your Facebook?
They're pretty embarrassing, I should delete.

46. Do you ever pass notes to your friends in school?
Dude, this is the technology era, paper won't even be needed anymore.

47. Do you replay things that have happened in your head?
Yes. Then I create things that never happened and replay them in my head.

48. Were you single over the last summer?
Yes.

49. Is your life anything like it was two years ago?
I wish. I loved Year 8.

50. What are you supposed to be doing right now?
My fucking notes, fuck my fucking life.

51. Do you hate the last guy you had a conversation with?
Of course not.

52. Are you nice to everyone?
Lol, what a joke. Ask anyone.

53. Have you ever liked someone you didn’t expect to?
Oh dear, yes.

54. Do you think you can last in a relationship for 6 months and not cheat?
It can't be that hard to not cheat, Jesus.

55. Are you good at hiding your feelings?
I don't know, I usually let it out. Mostly anger. But I could be if I tried.

56. Do you think you like someone?
Yeeeaaaaaa-nooo... I don't know

57. Have you kissed someone whose name starts with a ‘J’?
No.

58. Do you prefer to be friends with girls or boys?
Girls are more relatable obviously, guys are not as much trouble. Most of the time.

59. Has any one of your friends ever seen you cry?
Really? Of course they have. I think...

60. Do you hate anyone?
No.

61. How’s your heart?
Slowly slowing down as my meaningless life progresses.

62. Is there something that happened in your past that you hate talking about?
I think this can apply to everyone.

63. Have you ever cried over a guy?
Oh dear, yes I think so. Time to kill myself, that's shameful.

64. Who is probably talking a load of crap about you right now?
Maybe not all crap, but they're probably not feeling angelic towards me right now.

65. Are your toenails painted pink?
I dislike painted toenails. But I haven't painted my fingernails in ages. After exams (Y)

66. Will your next kiss be a mistake?
Lolwut.

67. Girls love it when boyfriends cry; correct?
Wut, why would anybody love it when anyone cries, especially if it's someone you love. I mean, girls go on constantly, me included, about how guys should be a little more sensitive, but there's nothing really wrong with not crying. I think not crying is a strength when you want to.

But I think it'd be cute if a guy cried in a movie or book.

68. Have your pants ever fallen down in public?
LOL yes.

69. Who was the last person you were on the phone with?
Christine.

70. How do you look right now?
Disgusting, I need to shower.

71. Do you have someone you can be your complete self around?
I don't believe anyone ever can.

72. Can you commit to one person?
I haven't actually needed to, but I don't see the difficulty in it.

73. Do you have someone of the opposite sex you can tell everything to?
I don't have trust issues, but I don't like burdening people either. Though I do it quite often. My apologies.

74. Have you ever felt replaced?
Sort of. I replace people a lot too.

75. Did you wake up cranky?
Yes.

76. Are you a jealous person?
Jealousy: Genevieve Wang

77. Are relationships ever worth it?
It must've been, if someone bothered to begin one.

78. Anyone you’re giving up on?
No, I hope it doesn't come down to that.

79. Currently wanting to see anyone?
Yes.

80. Name something you have to do tomorrow?
Study. Or die.

81. Last person you cried in front of?
No one, but Ricky heard what Love Story did to me.

82. Is there someone you will never forget?
I don't forget things. Except crucial information for exams. Things always escape my mind when I really need them with me.

83. Do you think the person you have feelings for is protective of you?
Lol.

84. If the person you wish to be with were with you, what would you be doing right now?
Conversing.

85. Are you over your past?
My past is not something to be fretting about.

86. Have you ever liked one of your best friends of the opposite sex?
Yes.

87. Is there anyone you can tell EVERYTHING to?
I would never do that.

88. If your first true love knocked on your door with apology and presents, would you accept?
What true love? But hypothetically, it'd depend on what he needs to apologise for.

89. So, the last person you kissed just happens to arrive at your door at 3AM; do you let them in?
LOL, HAI CHRISTINE.

90. Have you ever liked someone who your friends hated?
Nah.

91. Will you be in a relationship in 2 months?
That'd be nice.

92. Is there anyone you know with the name Michael?
So many of them around.

93. Have you ever kissed a Matthew?
Nup.

94. Were you in a relationship in January? How was it going?
It was going great. Me and watermelon were so in love, we couldn't get enough of each other. I ate him everyday ;)

95. Were you happy with the person you liked in March?
No, no.

96. Don’t tell me lies, is the last person you texted attractive?
Ew Audrey?

97. Who do you have texts from?
Audrey, Christine, Ricky, Eric, Carla.

98. If the person you like says they like someone else, what would you say?
Good for you.

99. Have you ever kissed someone older than you?
Yes.

100. Who’s in your profile picture with you?
On FB, Anika, Audrey, Christine, Jina, Sylvia and Tanya (Y)

101. Ever kissed under fireworks?
They'd probably distract me from kissing.

102. Has anybody ever given you butterflies?
Yes, ew.

10:42 PM

Mens rea

I slept remotely early last night. Earlier than usual Friday nights, except I woke up at fucking noon, fuck my life. That just wiped out 3 hours of potential study. Except I have been working for the past 4 hours. I spent two hours on English and history and I was about to start geography until I realised I didn't print them out laksjdlks and we just got a new modem so the printer isn't connected to the computer yet so f;skflskfs. I shall start science after this post.

That was a condensed paragraph, I have not much else to say except that I had a bacon and egg sandwich for brunch which was delicious.

It's such a nice day, and I'm so pissed I'm cooped up inside. Also, it's said to reach high 20s this week. The joy. I don't feel like sweating. Yesterday, we were so worked up from science and running to the station, Eric and Ricky could feel our body heat emanating.

Deary me, exams are so soon. I think eating just then stopped my flow of productivity endorphin, which does not make sense. My hand also hurts from writing and I have four pages of quotes TT

Yeah alright, bye.

5:04 PM

Friday, October 14, 2011

MOTHER JOYCE

I am quite proud of myself for avoiding the computer yesterday. Instead, I spent the evening with maths. But I ended up escaping via the bathroom window.

Anyway, I don't know, yesterday was most likely boring. I only remember the geothermal presentation which was fun and jigging RE in the morning LOL. Me, Christine, Tanya, Anika, Joumana, Lisha and Aparna just sat on the oval and attempted study but we ended up talking about other pressing matters, like uniforms and formal. It's a trivial world we live in.

So today, we had PE and we played basketball. LOL Anika was such a fail with her lay-up shot, where the ball hit her instead and her fail ballerina twirl. We lost pretty bad, but it was super fun. I want to join the Bollywood dance group next year!

Geography second which was just, omg. I think sport drained me, so I was basically falling asleep.

Maths was pretty minimal revision, I still haven't finished the past papers, but we basically spent the whole lesson discussing Carla and Tanya's party.

SCIENCE! It deserves a whole paragraph, because Ms Smyth is fucking awesome for doing this revision game. Okay so I think me and Audrey got downgraded a group, or Christine got upgraded, because our groups are organised like that. I was a star (Y) And Angela, Christine, Sylvia and Tanya were on my team. Yeah we sound pretty shit together right? BUT WE FUCKING OWNED EVERYONE. Won 5 times! I got 2 right, fancy that. Actually, we all got one right except Angela LOL. The irony.

It was so much fun, but it was so stressful. We were all sweating. LOL one question was to draw the reproductive system of a male and Jina's looked like a bird's. And Tanya drew one but put all the things that were supposed to be in the testes, in the penis. And Sylvia's balls were bigger than her penis. Sigh, that was our last one :( I'm going to miss Ms Smyth so much. I'M GOING TO MISS OUR CLASS /sob.

Anyway, we had to run to the station to buy tickets and all us science Matrix people went to Strathfield. Me, Audrey and Christine had some pretty disappointing, idk what food. Everyone else had to go physics tutor, so it was us three and Sylvia and Tanya. We attempted studying at Gloria Jeans. I swear, it was just Korean infestation, I felt so self-conscious. Yeah, I don't know.

So we saw the roll for our class, and me and Christine randomly had dibs on the guy names we saw. Hers was Rodger and mine was Franco LOL. Then in class, we were waiting for the role, and my guy was quite attractive, but Christine's. Oh my god, we couldn't stop laughing, I was scratching myself to stop. The lesson was boring though, the teacher was so fast and I got homework TT

Train'd with Eric to Penno. The moisture.

HOLY SHIT I JUST WATCHED VAMPIRE DIARIES MOTHER HOLY FUCK. I hate this show, I HATE it. And PLL didn't come out today.

Sigh, everybody is studying. Or at least attempting, since they're all on FB anyway, so they can't be very productive.

I can't believe one week is gone. It didn't even feel like we had holidays, I'm suffering too much.

Speaking of, exams are in two days.

9:34 PM

Wednesday, October 12, 2011

A kiss is just a kiss

Hi bitches.

So I'm attempting maths. Two more chapters to go OMG. Then I really got to study English.

So the senior uniform is just, not impressive. Not particularly comfortable and it feels so naked at the back, I seriously didn't think about my ass lifting the skirt higher up. And oh my god, when the wind blew, the skirt just went WHOOSH. I don't understand how some girls can literally wear it right under their butt.

Anyway, we got to miss first and second period because we were guides for Open Day which was pretty boring, I talked so much with Christine and Michelle. But it was worth missing commerce and then we finished like, halfway through food tech and turned out everyone was hiding in Mariot's staffroom, eating.

SAIL, I don't know, I'm so screwed.

English last, which was our last lesson before exams. We did a practice school cert. and I cannot comprehend how difficult it was. It actually wasn't very, but the questions were pretty dodgy, and we weren't very on time either. Actually, me and Christine spent half the lesson sneaking those cone-shaped corn cracker things.

The train and bus ride was just lkasjdksldsa. Complicated.

I got home and I fell asleep on The Lost Hero this time. And then I shoveled down fried rice and sausage and potato and salad and good grief, I ate so much.

Yeah I don't know, I'll finish maths now.

10:08 PM

Tuesday, October 11, 2011

seize the day!

Hello.

So everyone was in senior uniform today (Y) Literally, first period was spent gushing about how old everyone looked and holey shit, I saw Sandra's KNEES. Her body looked so nice, but so out of place with her head LOL. And Jess' boobs were threatening to poke my face.

For English, we did a practice SC which was pretty easy, but really stupid. I don't understand the point of it, how can you let people take this easy test and then drop out and basically ruin their eyes? At least that's how I see it.

Maths next which was, I don't know, revision is just making me really sad. But I'm attempting it right now (Y)

Commerce, I love commerce. I can't believe I'm saying this but omgad I'm gonna miss it so much! And today was kind of our last proper lesson because we're doing Open Day guide things tomorrow. But Hindmarsh gave us a mofo homework task. BUT we got 95% for our workplace video LOL. Such a fluke.

History, I highlighted my notes.

Brandon shouted me and Christine pizza, tyvm :) And we met Wendy's formal date and Audrey and Christine's primary friend, Tim? And I was quite impressed that he was getting her a corsage.

I was reading Hush Hush when I got home. Things were much simpler further back in the plot. Point is, I fell asleep on it for like, 2 hours and no one thought to woke me up, so when I did wake up, I decided to run to fully wake up. It's taken me till now to start studying.

I'm really dead.

9:45 PM

Monday, October 10, 2011

string of profanity

Now that we attend school again, I'll actually have more to write about which is probably a good thing. I dunno, I enjoy like, writing up posts and I like reading what I have to say, but I'm not sure about others :L

ANYWAY I couldn't sleep till 1am, even though I went to bed just before midnight. And I totally missed my alarm, but I somehow turned it off while unconscious. It was so cold. This is spring?

It was so good seeing everyone again, but that faded after first period. Oh we met the new principal, Dr Briggs (Y) He was standing next to Mr Hatton and was towering over him by a ruler, it was so cute.

English first and I'm so stressed for the exam now. We have 2 hours to do multiple choice, short answer, making choices and LOTF essay. So fucked. And we got our practice essays back which we all did pretty bad in, so that's okay.

We only have three sport lessons left and we did touch football today. It's ironic, because you don't kick the ball, so why call it foot-ball. And it's impossible to get past the try-line unless you tackle, but we're not beefy enough for that. Or brave enough.

Hydraulics presented in science, which was so boring I slept, sorry Audrey. I hope Smyth doesn't mark us on this shit because everyone would've failed their presentations. Our class is so loud, I would've started shouting profanities. I like that word.

Michelle, I borrowed the Count of Monte Cristo, so I don't have to read off my mum's phone (Y)

Maths was revision and I swear, Tourikis has supersonic hearing, I couldn't even hear myself whisper. And I did terrible in revision, foreshadowing how I'll do for the year.

OH MY GOD I forgot to mention, we got these formal permission deposit slips and we have to confirm whether or not we have dates in 10 days. Like, seriously, if you were super confident, you could tick that you're bringing a partner and then find one in the next few weeks, but most of us don't have that luxurious option. Fuck. I don't know what I'm going to do.

Life pisses me off.

4:45 PM

Sunday, October 9, 2011

No one puts Baby in a corner

This is the last day of holidays which really depresses me. I attempted maths study today but I stopped after 3 chapters. I'm so hopeless.

I tried on my uniform again with the shortened skirt and it'd look so much better if it gave me a waist FML. It also looks pretty terrible with a jumper because I swear something's wrong with the collar. It's so big and stiff, like other things (Y)

Ah, last night I was watching Dirty Dancing and omguacamole Patrick Swayze /orgasm. I was sort of dancing along :) What really pisses me off though, is that I can never remember how the original Time of My Life verse goes because the fucking Black Eyed Peas were stupid enough to fucking remix a classic. It's infuriating. .

Exams are in one fucking week and I'm so fucking screwed I'm going to have a meltdown. And I'll either starve or binge as a way to combat stress. On top of that, got to worry about trivial shiet like the formal lasdfghjk. And we got to sort out lots of relationship issues.

Clockwork Prince comes out in December so I'll have a new book to read soon enough, and there'll be City of Lost Souls after that and the next book in Bloodlines. I don't know what I'll do when my authors stop writing. Except I know Rick Riordan is starting a new series about Norse gods, whatever they are, except modernizing it is getting really dull. Speaking of, I should also read the Kane Chronicles. No I should actually study really. I'll never get into college at this rate.

I think I should sleep soon, otherwise I won't be able to wake up on time tomorrow. I'm so excited to see everyone!

8:19 PM

Saturday, October 8, 2011

I prefer prejudices

Slept at 3, woke up at 12 (Y) My life is going to be awesome.

I watched Love Story last night, which again reduced me to tears. WHY. WHY DOES NOBODY PRODUCE MOVIES LIKE THIS? Oh yeah, because nobody has talent anymore. Fuck. Whatever, that's already all out of my system, sorry Crack.

Anyway, obviously I have no intention of starting work today. My life is awesome.

I saw Audrey's FB thing about The Notebook, and seriously, I didn't find it that sad. At least, not enough to cry, except the first time sometime around the end. Otherwise, the movie is just overrated. It was better than the book though, that was some boring stuff. But yeah, the main part that gets me is when Noah says;

"I wrote you 365 letters. I wrote you everyday for a year. It wasn't over. It still isn't over."

Yeah that's about it. Anyway, I say that a lot. Okay my life is depressing, there's nothing to talk about.

Love means never having to say you're sorry.

3:33 PM

Friday, October 7, 2011

the tide that takes one by surprise

OH MY GOD I JUST FINISHED SON OF NEPTUNE. FUUUUUU WHAT IS THIS CLIFFHANGER I THREW MY STUPID BOOK FUCKING HELL I HATE AUTHORS. Jokes, Rick Riordan is my hero. But it literally pains my heart that I have to wait another year for the next book which is going to be fucking epic.

Anyway, that's basically what I did all day. Oh last night, I was downloading movies and I watched An Affair to Remember which absolutely killed me, and I'm pretty sure it had the same effect on Anika.

Then I watched Vampire Diaries oh my god, what is with all this suspense, fml. This can't be good for my health.

I haven't touched my work since Tuesday at Jina's. I'm a lost cause. Exams are promptly in two weeks.

Life is only precious because it ends. That made me slightly less afraid of death. Or less wary.

8:18 PM

Thursday, October 6, 2011

I just need to brag right now, about my amazing taste in sophistication that Anika has confirmed in thanking me for making her watch Roman Holiday. I am just, amazing.

10:20 PM

eyes wide shut

So I had a very nice quiet day with my beloved books :)

Last night though, I was shitting my pants because I was so bored, I decided to read the synopsis for The Ring and then I couldn't sleep because I was so scared some corpse face would spring out of my computer and I would die from fear.

Anyway, I was planning an early start to the day, but I ignored all my alarms and woke up around 11, so I got to Hornsby around 1:30. Finally got my 2 blouses and my two books! I read Silence on the bus home and I only finished about an hour ago and oh my god, I hate this. I have this need to finish my new books immediately but when I do, I've just prolonged the year-long wait for the next one. It's like masochism.

But elaborating on Silence, AUDREY LEAVE. Those scenes with Patch and Nora were just laskdjkl so fucking hot I came. Jokes, but I totally would've if I was her. And it was just so jaw-dropping I CAN'T WAIT FOR THE NEXT BOOK. Which happens to be the last one though /sob. I don't know, I hate how the author totally overwrites but those romantic scenes are just, my life. I think I'm going to go reread them again.

Then I phoned Audrey and we're quite excited for Keshani's party :) I'm going to go all Barbie (Y)

They're creating a Broadway show of Breakfast at Tiffany's. What even.

Now I will start Son of Neptune and it appears I will be wasting tomorrow to finish it as well. I have missed you a great deal, Percy.

Actually, I'm going to try on my uniform. I need to get it hemmed tomorrow.

9:04 PM

Wednesday, October 5, 2011

mental suicide

The satisfaction of biting in a sweet strawberry.

I miss salsa dancing like crazy. Hell, I miss dancing. I think I should sign up for that ballroom class, except I'm afraid no one my age does it and it's all old rapist men. Plus no one wants to do it with me.

Anyway, I refuse to sleep late into the morning now, I'm going to suffer at school. God I don't want school, I want the world to end right now. Life is exhausting because I do nothing and doing nothing leaves no room except to think. Thinking is the most unhealthy thing in the world. Thoughts are the shadows of our feelings, always darker, emptier and simpler.

We are each our own devil, and we make this world our hell.

I've got to stop listening to nihilists.

1:59 PM

Tuesday, October 4, 2011

CRACK

I'm in the most fantastic mood. Firstly, I got all my notes done but maths, and second, I was with our Q group today - Anika, Audrey, Christine, Jina, Sylvia and Tanya :D

SO Audrey took me and Christine to Jina's and I saw Manslut at the library. I think we were the first ones there. Anyway, we raided her top floor and got our stuff set up and the floor was all messed already and then ANIKA came. Then Sylvia. Then Tanya. And for a while, we were actually all really studious just before Tanya came, because we hadn't opened the food just yet. Then we did. Literally, we were such pigs. LOL Christine's fail PLANNED photo-bomb. I have no idea what we were doing. We kept trying to stay silent for 20 minutes with the exception of work-related questions, but yeah that failed.

Lunchtime was really yummy spaghetti bolognese and pull-apart bread and salad and I was so stuffed from our earlier snacking. I think we were talking about body's and appetites or some shit like that. My stomach expanded more than it did at Christine's, I wanted to die. It didn't help that after, we didn't stop laughing. I think we made a group blog LOL.

OH MY GOD CHRISTINE TOOK THE UGLIEST PICTURE IN THE WORLD, I FUCKING FAINTED. Like, I was gagging on my spit. So the rest of us copied the photo and Audrey looked like a demented Bugs Bunny, I wanted to die. Anyway, I called Lowes, that piece of shit, and they told me they had a couple more Size 10 skirts left so me and Sylvia, like, ran to Penno and got to Hornsby in half an hour (Y)

FUCK they said the Size 10 skirts were gone, but the lady I spoke to on the phone thankfully kept one for me. Thing is, we ate too much, so when I tried it on, though it fit fine before, it felt tighter TT But I bought it anyway and I'll go detox again, after Thursday's outing. Then we ran back to Jina's house in 13 minutes (Y)

They made green tea without us :( But yeah, got back into a studying zone. Jokes. Nah I think we actually did some more notes. OMG I hate not remembering. Skip hours and then it was almost dinner, so we took group photos. Self timer (Y) Yeah they're really retarded, but Audrey better get them up on blog/FB soon. Jina's pillow is infected with feet.

Dinner was rice and lots of chicken and green beans :) Then we reminisced about Year 7 memories and Anika's story about the half Jap/American guy who flashed Anika. Some shit about our cultural names and I CAN'T BELIEVE I CAN'T REMEMBER.

Only Christine and Jina bothered to continue study after dinner. I think we had some more deep discussions and then stupid Anika had to leave. Then Sylvia and then I started studying and I finished English, thus I finished ALL. Except maths of course. So then we started singing and tidying and yeah, then me, Audrey and Christine had to leave :/

This post took me a while because my memory was failing me. I might attempt some maths tonight. Probably not.

TODAY WAS SO MUCH FUN. I love you guys.

9:52 PM

Monday, October 3, 2011

You're so delicious

The holidays are so cold :( But it'll get warm as soon as school starts, because the greater beings love to fuck around with us.

Anyway, after Roman Holiday, I decided to watch Lion King instead. Fuck I swear these posts are supposed to be 100000x longer but that was seriously all I had to say. Whattafail.

Well, Jina's tomorrow, which I'm very excited for, and I think I'll sneak to Hornsby and buy my uniform or something. I refuse to revert to my junior summer. Then Thursday is karaoke, and it'd better work out or I'm going to fucking rage. Sigh, then studyyyyy. Life sucks, I'm so over it.

Yesterday, I decided to test my grandparents spa bath and I think I soaked too long and sweated everything out because I almost fell when I stood up. I think I fell asleep in there for a bit.

Anyway, I didn't bring any work, and I'm so cbf to start English because LOTF is so fucking hard to set out and I have a feeling the essay will be on character, just like for Much Ado.

Jenny if you read this, I'm going to tell you about my dream a few nights ago :)

ALRIGHT so I was with Djokovic and then he randomly took off his pants and he was cupping his penis and then there were his balls BUT then there was a SECOND penis, that reached down to his knees. At least I think it was a penis, it might've been another ball sack. And then we both started laughing (Y)

Alright I got nothing more useful to say so I might revise history and PE, since they're all I have.

1:00 PM

Sunday, October 2, 2011

you BEAST

I love Roman Holiday so fucking much, oh my god, I love Audrey Hepburn. I LOVE IT SO FUCKING MUCH I THINK I MIGHT REPLAY IT RIGHT NOW.

11:46 PM

632

What the fuck is wrong with me?

7:40 PM

I will know for sure

Got a haircut which I am actually not complaining about because my fringe is finally normal again. Except it's gay to tie up. Sigh, things will never be right.

OMG I had such a nice dream, I swear, the guy in it, I invented ages ago and he kept reappearing in random dreams, but last night was particularly nice :) Then my mum woke me up to go to Parra TT

ALSDFDHKHJDF waited an hour for the hairdresser and it took him an hour to TRIM. I don't even understand. OMG there was this guy behind, sitting across me and we could see each other in our mirrors and he was waiting for my hairdresser and since it took so long, he kept dirtying me the entire time which was so moist because my hair looks gross in the process of cutting.

Anyway, I kinda ruined my detox after eating some huge bowl of rice and chicken so I won't eat tomorrow (Y)

Sigh, my mum and sister were also trying to help me find formal dresses and they're either ridiculously dressy or ridiculously slutty. Far out, how can those tiny tight slinky dresses be comfortable or show any sense of decency? It's disgusting, you can't find anything unless you want to attend dressed as a hooker.

Anyway, I'm excited for Jina's on Tuesday and my craving for Pepper Lunch is gone so I ceebs going to the city and karaoke. I got to fucking study, fuck my life.

Me, Brandon and Christine had an 11.5 hour call yesterday. Well, I left at 11.5 hours, iono when they slept.

OHO The Lost Hero and Silence comes out in 2 days! Except that might only be in America. I don't understand why all countries can't receive the same things at the same time, entertainment-wise.

6:23 PM